


Always have, Always will

by rubysilk98



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Shapeshifters, Angst, Bunny Junmyeon, Childhood Friends, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Minor Character Death, Minor Violence, Mystery, Shapeshifting, blonde junmyeon because i say so, it's a mix of sad and fluff, mention of needles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:01:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 38,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28495002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rubysilk98/pseuds/rubysilk98
Summary: Chanyeol comes back to his hometown looking for his old friend after a decade. He expected to see the same beautiful smile greeting him just like he remembered. However, Chanyeol underestimated how time can change a person. Who would’ve thought that Chanyeol will spend his days there searching for answers surrounding his mysterious childhood friend?PROMPT #S289: Weird. The little rabbit he saw in the woods...looks way /too much/ like the neighbour next door. (Shapeshifter AU)
Relationships: Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 5
Kudos: 25
Collections: Starry Suho Fest (R1)





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> a/n: I finally finish this fic SOBS asjdhdjkf firstly, thank you to the mods for being patient with me when I have a lot of things going on asdfghjkl (seriously, gotta appreciate them ;_;) and also hosting this ^__^ Secondly, to the prompter, *hands you this fic* I hope this fic gives you justice. I may have made a whole drama out of the prompt so I hope you enjoy it! I hope everyone enjoys this fic!
> 
> BUTTT!!! Make sure to read the tags. 
> 
> TW // mentions of minor violence, needles and blood. minor character death. slight mention of abuse.
> 
> Please read it at your own risk!!

9.9k words

* * *

It is the dawn of winter. The snow has yet to fall but Chanyeol is already comfortable in his thick cardigan with a warm cup in his hands. Placing the coffee on his glass table, with a comfortable hum, he eyes his empty bed and empty walls. Chanyeol isn't at all someone who is properly organized but at least for this trip, he has a checklist of what to take it with him. His luggage are placed by the side of his bed. The boxes of his everyday stuff that varies from stationaries to his utensils are neatly stacked on the ground.

Glancing around his apartment, he surely will miss this room for a while. The room where he would always brainstorm for ideas. As contrary to what people think, being a writer doesn't just mean looking for inspiration from being outside. After all, his books are always about mythical creatures. Something unobtainable in the real world.

And yet, Chanyeol thinks for the next book, he wants to write on something real. Something... that tells him a story that’s close to himself.

What better way of it than to go back to his roots? He's been away from his birth state for so long. It is time for Chanyeol to get in touch with the man he was while growing up.

Perhaps, one of his drive to go back home is due to him finding a pile of letters he used to exchange with a boy back then.

It wasn't just a boy.

He was his best friend... at least until the letters stopped coming. It might sound like an overstatement but after his mother's battle with a chronic disease failed her heart, Chanyeol lost all touch with his hometown. His father assimilates perfectly at this foreign land. He has always been a little bit different from the people back at home.

The corner of his lips tugs downwards. If his mother was still here, he would have taken her with him. Chanyeol knows how much his mother would love it. His father only gives him words of encouragement rather than joining him. Not even a thought to his old friends there. It’s unkind to say that his father had forgotten his roots but that’s exactly what has happened.

Still, above all, Chanyeol looks forward to his trip back home. After all, it's been 11 years.

Although it has been more than a decade, Chanyeol gets a little excited when he recognizes a specific landmark. Like the giant Oak tree he used to play around at. Or the massive eagle statue he would encounter before entering the roundabout to his house. It unlocked so many memories that Chanyeol didn't think he still had it stored.

"How long will your stay be again?"

Chanyeol's trance from staring out the window of his car is being cut off by the woman sitting next to him. She has long dark brown hair wearing a plain loose black dress. Her hair tied into a fishtail braid which accompanies with an identical colour hat as she writes something in her book.

She introduced herself as Taeyeon. Apparently, she's the new owner of the house he formerly lived in. Her family had bought it from his family years ago and ever since then, the place has been used for various occasions.

"9 months at most." Chanyeol answers.

The woman hums, lifting her gaze from her book. "Is it enough for you to finish your book?"

That honestly depends on his stay here, Chanyeol reflects. He's not too worried about it. He has all the time he needs. "I hope so." He replies with a hopeful grin.

"We’re almost there." The woman notes when she looks out of the window.

Chanyeol knew. It's the smooth driveway that tells him that they are already close by. The road to his house has always been a rocky path but it gets better once they enter the gate of the residence.

When the car stops, Taeyeon got out first while juggling the book in her hand. Chanyeol follows suit with a pleased expression on his face. _Behold_ , his old house where he had spent 15 years of his life at.

He's finally back home.

"You might be surprised that it is not as white as it used to be." Taeyeon beckons him to come closer to the door. There's a padlock to which she fishes out the keys and swiftly unlocks it. "As soon as my father bought this house, we gave it a little revamping.”

Not that he minded. Chanyeol never imagined the colour pastel yellow would fit so well with his old house. Certainly, Taeyeon’s father has a good eye. Judging from how well this house has been preserved, Chanyeol is glad that this house was handed into the right hands. "The last renter was around 2 months ago. But don't worry, prior to your arrival, this house was cleaned spotless." She assures him.

Chanyeol can see that. It does look brand new.

Scanning this house, there are a few noticeable differences of the interior. Either it has changed so much or that he has a foggy memory of how it used to look like. Nevertheless, being here makes Chanyeol feels nostalgic. It was on these grounds that Chanyeol had his first steps. "It’s good to be back." Chanyeol mutters as he drags his luggage in.

The first place he wishes to check is his favourite spot in the house. Pushing the door to the balcony open, the curtains dance as the wind enters this huge house. Outside, there's the view of the lake where Chanyeol remembers was a way for him to feel peaceful and serene.

It is a wonderful view at day, calming sensation at night.

"Just as beautiful as it was." Chanyeol sighs as he breathes in the fresh air. The city truly lacks this aspect of its environment.

The woman chuckles behind her fingers. "Of course, the lake isn't going anywhere."

"Ah, yes. Indeed."

Even so, the trees have grown so much that Chanyeol can barely see anything but the lake. However, if he squints his eyes, he can still see the small house situated not far from him. Only the roof but barely. His lips unconsciously turn into a smile.

"Does the Kim family still lives in that house?" He asks.

"I beg your pardon?" Taeyeon comes closer to Chanyeol to see where he is pointing his finger at.

"That house. Is the Kims still staying there?" He repeats.

At the question, Taeyeon dithers. "You really have no idea what has happened over 11 years, have you?"

Based on the tone of her voice, that doesn't sound too good. "What exactly happened?"

Instead of answering, Taeyeon insists to save the story for the last part of the house tour. Chanyeol easily complies without thinking much. Still, being absent for more than a decade, surely Chanyeol would miss a lot of things. If only his friend hadn't stop writing to him. To which it births a concern in his head.

_Is he okay?_

The house isn't worth to be called a mansion but it is practically big enough to give away that Chanyeol comes from a wealthy family. Renting this for 9 months was just a snap of his fingers. They’ve been strolling from the highs and lows of the house for almost 15 minutes. If someone was to ask Chanyeol, he rather does something else.

"Taeyeon." Chanyeol calls for her.

The woman pretends that she didn't just hear her name being called for the nth time. "And the garage here we had it renovated to a bigger size that it can fit up to 3 cars." Taeyeon shows him the biggest change in the house throughout the 11 years.

"Taeyeon." He tries again.

Breathing out a sigh, she turns around to face the younger. "Yes, Chanyeol."

"Can I meet him now?"

The deal they made is to finish with the house tour and as promised, Taeyeon will personally take Chanyeol to meet his old friend. Apparently, Taeyeon thinks that it wouldn't be wise to let Chanyeol introduce himself to his old friend alone. Chanyeol’s not sure the reason behind that but Taeyeon refuses to tell him anything. _Yet_. He's been listening half-heartedly while Chanyeol keeps glancing outside to peek at the roof every now and then. The truth is, he wouldn't be this restless if Taeyeon didn't made it seem like something is wrong with his neighbour.

"Alright." Taeyeon exasperates, finally agreeing to not stall any longer. "But remember, a lot has changed in 11 years." She warns him.

Chanyeol obviously knows that. 11 years _is_ a long time. Though Chanyeol thinks he himself didn't change much.

He wonders how time has changed for his friend instead.

_"Chanyeol."_

_He hears his name is being whispered above him._

_No. Chanyeol doesn't want to open his eyes. He knows what the latter is going to say. It's not like he didn't hear the sound of his father's car pulling at the front of the porch._

_His father is going to beckon him to come home._

_"Chanyeol." The soft voice calls him again. "Your father is here."_

_Maybe if Chanyeol pretends to be asleep, his father would feel sorry and come by another hour. Going back home now means having to face an almost empty house. Chanyeol dreads every single second of having to put his stuff into the boxes._

_Suddenly, he feels a hand caressing through his hair. The movements are so gentle, combing through his locks as the other hums to a familiar song._

Sigh _. He doesn't want to leave._

_"Chanyeol. Promise you'll write to me."_

_He will. Every week. Every day. His friend can count him on that. Pulling the hand that was on his head, he brings it closer to his lips and kisses the back of the palm. Opening his eyes, he watches how his friend is staring down at him in sorrow._

_"I promise, Junmyeon"_

When they pulled in front of the driveway, Chanyeol didn't remember this place being so...deserted. The way the trees and bushes seem like it's hiding this house from the outside world. Chanyeol is excited but he can't bring himself to smile at such a blue atmosphere around here.

This place _was_ like a sunny daydream to him. He had a huge house with the best lake view and yet, it was his friend's house where he spent most of the daylights at.

It seems as if it is not just his house which had changed. This house didn’t look like it aged well. "Believe it or not, it used to be different here." Chanyeol frowns at how the house in front of him feels similar to an abandoned house.

The engine of the car stops as both of them stalls in front of the house. Is there even anyone living in there?

"You'll be surprised how much your old friend has changed."

Chanyeol's head turns to look at Taeyeon. "You know him?"

She snorts. "Who doesn't? The whole town does."

 _Oh_... he guesses that Junmyeon has made a name of his own. However, Chanyeol is sensible enough of the situation to know it's not in a good way. At least from the tone of her voice. "Will you tell me what happened?"

Taeyeon shrugs. "I figured you would want to hear it from himself."

That's true. Then again, there are always 2 sides of the story. He doesn't know which one to uncover first.

Both of them got out of the car. Taeyeon walked first through the porch. Chanyeol would have but he's anxious as to what had happened here while he was gone. This place… It lacks the warmth that radiated here back then.

Arriving at the front door, Taeyeon takes a quick glance at him before knocking on the door. When there's no reply after 30 seconds, she tried again.

"Maybe he's not home." Chanyeol says after a minute of silence had passed.

"He's here." The woman nudges to the bicycle leaning on the wall. Deciding to believe Taeyeon's words, Chanyeol waits as Taeyeon continues to knock on the door.

Just then, the sound of doorknob clicking can be heard and the door creaks open just slightly. Chanyeol takes a deep intake of breath when a strawberry blonde hair peeks out through the slight gap. "Good morning."

"Morning. It's me." Taeyeon greets him with a smile and a wave.

Suddenly, the door is shut again and Chanyeol can hear locks after locks are being unlocked and then the door is wide open. "You brought a friend." The blond male murmurs.

Taeyeon nods as she pushes Chanyeol forward. "Yeah. _Your_ friend."

Just like almost everyone that Chanyeol had met, they had to tilt their head up to properly look at Chanyeol. Confusion plasters on the blond's face. Does he not... recognize him?

"This is Park Chanyeol. He used to live in the big house a few walks from here."

The blond male's eyes enlarge at the name. Instantly, he stares at Chanyeol very intently. "...Chanyeol?"

"Hey." Chanyeol begins. He's not sure if he should reach out for a handshake or not. The only thing he can manage is a nod of his head.

Junmyeon in front of him had to take a few seconds to process before he clamps his mouth shut with his palm and turns around. Chanyeol didn't know what to make of that so he just stands dumbly while glancing at Taeyeon. Even the latter is confused.

"I'm sorry." Junmyeon mutters, shaking his head then turns to both of them again. They can see how Junmyeon is trying to conceal his smile. "I'm just very surprised. Uh... Do you… Do you want to come in?"

"Sure." Chanyeol replies. This means that Junmyeon recognizes him, right?

Junmyeon steps aside to let his guests in. Judging from his face, he seems pretty nervous. The hallway seems dark. That is until Junmyeon turns on the light and even so, it isn't as bright as his place. "I uhm... It's been a while. Was it 9 years? Or 8?"

"11 years." Chanyeol corrects him with a smile.

At first, Chanyeol did felt a little nervous. However, seeing how the man in front of him is even more restless than he is, surprisingly Chanyeol felt calmer than before. The man in front of him goes back and forth to make sure that things are organized and in place. Chanyeol wanted to say that it is fine but Junmyeon appears a little too excited.

"I'm sorry. The house... I don't usually have many guests here." The blond male chuckles nervously as he picks up some of the scattered clothes on the floor.

The house isn't that messy. No, not at all. Chanyeol wishes Junmyeon would lay ease. It's been a while since they've seen each other thus Chanyeol would like to see the other properly. "Junmyeon." Chanyeol calls him and immediately the blond man stops in his tracks. "You should sit down too."

Junmyeon pauses for a while as he looks around. Really. Chanyeol wishes he would sit down. At last, the blond finally takes a seat on a stool adjacent to Chanyeol.

"I'll make the drinks." Taeyeon announces.

"Oh, drinks! I'll be right—"

Taeyeon shakes her head as she pushes Junmyeon down to sit. "You guys catch up. I can do it." Junmyeon seems hesitant but he lets the woman wander off to his kitchen.

 _They seem close_ , Chanyeol thinks. Chanyeol still hasn't seen any vibrant changes. It's only natural that Junmyeon feels awkward around him. "So, how are you?"

"I'm... doing okay." Junmyeon fiddles with the hem of his sweater.

Now that they're in the bright living room, Chanyeol can see his old friend clearly. There isn't any apparent difference from the way Junmyeon was back then. Well, except for the ageing. Other than that, his hair, his eyes and even the way he dresses, still seems the same. He still likes to wear clothes that are a little too big for him. "You look just like how I remembered you." Chanyeol says.

The blond man chuckles. "I can't say the same for you. I thought you hated having long hair."

"Ahh..." Chanyeol's hand goes to the back of his hair. His hair indeed was getting longer and a tad bit messier. He used to hate it but it’s been a while since he had grown his hair quite long and Chanyeol must admit, it's not so bad. "It's not a bad change, is it?"

"I think it looks good..." Junmyeon replies, a little bit shyly. That comment obviously made Chanyeol on cloud nine judging from the wide grin on his face. Instantly, Junmyeon's hands cover his mouth as he fights his own urge to do so. "I forgot how bright your smile is." Junmyeon says behind his palm.

 _Ah_... why are they both smiling and giggling like a pair of school kids? Chanyeol knows about how his smile is very contagious. He gets that all the time. But seeing his old friend’s laugh, it made Chanyeol mirror the expression.

Two happy fellas reuniting once more.

Now, Chanyeol is not sure what Taeyeon had meant previously. The way she worded it was in a serious tone but looking at Junmyeon right now, he seems cheerful. Beautiful and cheerful like how he was 11 years ago. She might have been mistaken.

"So, what do you do, Junmyeon?" Chanyeol asks.

The shorter male glances at the pile of clothes folded on the table. "I uh... do some stitching and alteration of clothes." Junmyeon answers while rubbing his nape. "Taeyeon helps me with the… customers."

"Oh. Do you have a shop in the town?"

The smile on Junmyeon becomes strained as he shakes his head. "No. I uh... work from home."

"The customers are through me." Taeyeon arrives just in time at the table with a tray of teacups and biscuits. She starts pouring the tea in the cup and Junmyeon picks it up to pass it to Chanyeol.

"Thanks." The brunet mutters before taking a sip. "That's interesting." Chanyeol is surprised to learn of Junmyeon's occupation. Back then, he remembers Junmyeon saying that he wants to work in a musical. Not as the actor, but as the one who plays the piano. He even created a time plan of 10 years and have it kept near his bed so that he can be reminded of his goal.

Then again, occupation and interest can change over time. More often than not, people don't even get to do the things they love. Chanyeol seems to be on the lucky portion.

"Chanyeol writes." Taeyeon fills in. "It's a hit at his place."

It's a bit embarrassing for him to promote his book so Chanyeol just told Junmyeon that he writes fiction. Junmyeon doesn't seem surprised at all. "I've always known you could make it." Junmyeon says proudly.

When Chanyeol got teased for ‘writing a diary’ when he was younger, Junmyeon was one of those who knew that Chanyeol didn't write a diary. He was simply writing stories and his imagination in the said book.

Junmyeon was his number 1 fan.

If only Junmyeon was there when he published his first book.

As the teacup gets emptier, they exchange a few more stories with each other. However, it is more likely that Chanyeol is the one who talked the most. The conversations always end up with Chanyeol telling Junmyeon what he had missed for the past years. Whenever Chanyeol tries to ask Junmyeon about himself, the man only gives short answers that are very vague. Due to this being their first meeting, Chanyeol didn't want to push Junmyeon.

"Oh!" Taeyeon suddenly gasps while pointing outside. "It's snowing!"

Both of them whip their head to the window so fast. It's true. There are snowflakes falling like rain behind the window. _Wow_ , Chanyeol is at awe. His first snow in his hometown in years. Glancing to the blond in front of him, Junmyeon is still staring at the window with a fond smile on his face.

His first snow _with_ Junmyeon in years.

_"Chanyeol! Chanyeol!"_

_The brunet groggily opens his right eye to see Junmyeon sitting up on their bed. The boy is staring outside the window with the blanket still wrapped over his lap. "Chanyeol, it's snowing!"_

_Glancing at the clock on his nightstand, it's 4 a.m. How come his friend is awake in the middle of the night? "Junmyeon, why are you up?" He sits up and scoots closer until he is resting his head on Junmyeon's shoulder. The latter pats Chanyeol's arm to show him the window. It’s started snowing outside. It won't be long until the snow covers the ground._

Of course _, no one is more excited to be surrounded with white than Junmyeon. His friend loves this season too much. For what reason, Chanyeol has yet to know._

_"I hope it covers the ground fast." Junmyeon whispers with delight in his voice. Chanyeol doesn't have to see his face to know that the other is beaming. Chanyeol manages to nod a little despite still in a daze. He hopes so too._

_Because Junmyeon looks the prettiest when he's happy._

"Chanyeol." The voice calls him so softly. Just like dandelions. Very delicate. It is one of the things that Chanyeol loves about this man.

"Yes, Junmyeon." Chanyeol answers with the same delicacy.

They are walking side by side outside while the snowflakes are making a nest on their heads and shoulders. Junmyeon kept having his hand out to collect them all. "Aren’t you going to ask me?"

Chanyeol hums with his hands behind his back. "About what?"

Junmyeon closes his palms as he stops in his tracks. The taller too mirrors his action and faces him. "About why I stopped writing to you."

It’s a question that was bound to come out. Supposedly it is even more understandable if Chanyeol had been the one to ask. To Junmyeon’s confusion, there are bigger loopholes that Chanyeol refuses to let Junmyeon fill in.

“Will you answer me if I asked?” Chanyeol asks instead.

Junmyeon finds himself at a loss of words. Is Chanyeol not curious? For the past decade, the town has only ill words for Junmyeon. Does he not wonder whether those rumours are true or false?

The blond’s eyes’ widen in realization. “You haven’t heard them, have you?”

“Of what?”

 _Ah… No wonder_ , Junmyeon thinks. Junmyeon wonders if Chanyeol would have come here if he did. “Of what this town has been saying… about me.” Junmyeon mumbles as he continues walking.

“Does it have anything to do with why you had stopped writing to me?” Chanyeol asks again. He hasn’t stroll around the town yet so the only information he received so far is through Taeyeon. Even then, Chanyeol has heard about Junmyeon being the talk of the town and it was his assumptions that say it isn’t a good kind of talk.

His confirmation once again is in Junmyeon’s words.

Junmyeon gulps before he answers. “No.”

The answer was simple and straightforward. Yet, Chanyeol can sense the heaviness in that one single word. “Then, why did you?” Chanyeol doesn’t know what the rumours are. Nor that is the most important thing in Chanyeol’s head. More than anything, he wants to know why they ended up as they are now.

There’s hesitancy in Junmyeon’s stance. Chanyeol knew him all too well. When the latter gets nervous, he would brush his knuckles repeatedly with his thumb. Just as what he is doing right now.

“I hope you don’t blame me, Chanyeol. After my parents had passed away, everything was… hard for me.”

Chanyeol’s steps halt. Mrs and Mr Kim… _They’re… gone?_

Has Chanyeol been so out of contact with his hometown to not know the people who used to feed him after school like they were his second parents… are no longer here…? “I… didn’t know.” He stutters, quite in a state of disbelief. He had found it weird how dark Junmyeon’s hallways were. Mrs Kim would never let a single corner of the house dim. To think such news is only arriving at him now after… after all these years. 11 years. “Junmyeon, if I knew…” His family would have visited back home. Maybe. His father loves the city more than his own place of birth but Chanyeol’s mother at least brings her love of the town to the new place. Still, Chanyeol wonders why didn’t anyone wrote to them about their former neighbours’ death.

“It’s fine, Chanyeol.” Junmyeon smiles a little as he pats Chanyeol’s arm. “At that time, I wouldn’t want you here anyway.”

The lips on Chanyeol’s face are pressed into a thin line. Is it because of the _rumours_? Chanyeol wonders if it started during that time. “Tell me, Junmyeon. What is the reason that people are talking about you?” Chanyeol takes Junmyeon’s hand from his arm and caresses the back of it.

_So soft._

Junmyeon’s eyes bore holes at his own hand before he clears his throat. “Didn’t Taeyeon tell you anything?”

“I want to hear your side of the story first.” Chanyeol replies as he draws a star with his finger on the smooth skin.

At the familiar action, Junmyeon couldn’t help the smile from escaping his lips. _Chanyeol remembers._ “You think there are two versions of the story?”

Chanyeol nods. “There are always two sides to a story.”

The blond chuckles before moving his hands until he is the one cupping Chanyeol’s large palm. “Don’t fret, Chanyeol. For my story, you will only have to listen to one.” Chanyeol’s hands are now empty without any touch as Junmyeon had moved away from him. “Perhaps, Taeyeon is more suitable to answer the question. After all, she hears them directly from the townspeople.”

Chanyeol only stands dumbly there as he watches his friend strides back into the house. If he can only hear one version, shouldn’t Chanyeol hear it directly from Junmyeon himself? That is what Chanyeol would’ve wanted if he is in Junmyeon’s shoes.

Weird.

Chanyeol didn’t expect to meet a mystery surrounding Junmyeon. The man who was always loved by the people he met, the man who gave the best impression and the one who made any boys and girls' heart flutter just by his smiling face….

_What happened to you, Kim Junmyeon?_

The day is getting late and Chanyeol knows from Taeyeon’s heavy sigh that it is already time to leave. After their stroll, there isn’t much exchange happened between Junmyeon and him. They are back talking about Chanyeol rather than Junmyeon, much to Chanyeol’s disappointment. He really wanted to draw out some truths but Junmyeon seems to be done about the topic.

Even their farewell seems… bleak. Chanyeol felt something was missing when Junmyeon waved him goodbye at his porch. This heavy feeling in his heart, he brings it back to his house.

“I know you have many questions in your head.” Taeyeon sits down onto one of Chanyeol’s classy sofas. Chanyeol does the same adjacent to her as he unties the cuff of his sleeves. “Tons. But…” He pauses.

“But…?”

Chanyeol bites his cheeks before he stands up again. From the carrier that he brought, Chanyeol takes out what it seems like a bottle of beer. With just his teeth, he uncaps the bottle and drinks it straight away. “I think I need to hear what this infamous rumour is all about.”

The brunet takes a seat again at his previous spot. He watches how Taeyeon goes deep in her thoughts before she stares confusedly at Chanyeol. “He didn’t tell you?”

“He said you’re more suited to do the deed.”

Taeyeon scoffs before shaking her head. “What a strange man.”

Chanyeol agrees. He can’t say that Junmyeon was always like this. If one thing that’s changed after all these years, it’s how mysterious Junmyeon has become.

“You better prepare yourself. This story is really heavy.” Taeyeon warns him.

Hearing that, Chanyeol takes another gulp of his beer before nodding for Taeyeon to begin.

“Do you know how Junmyeon’s parents died?”

Chanyeol shakes his head. “No. Not even the year.”

“Well, Junmyeon’s parents died when he was still a teenager. He was 16, if I’m not mistaken.”

Sixteen? That should be correct considering how Junmyeon stopped writing to him when both of them were sixteen at that time. Which means, just a few months after Chanyeol had left the town.

“They were on their way to send Junmyeon to school. It was a car accident.” Taeyeon explains. From the looks of her, she finds this story uncomfortable to explain. “After his parents died, a well-known doctor who is said to be a good friend of his parents decided to care for Junmyeon. At least until he is 18. She moved in with Junmyeon shortly after his parents died.”

“In _that_ house?”

Taeyeon nods. “Yes. That house.”

So Junmyeon wasn’t really all alone as Chanyeol had thought. He really had assumed that Junmyeon had to manage on his own for 11 years. That is quite a relief then.

“However, the story starts going south from there.” The woman frowns while her hands are busy playing with her coat. “They said the loss of his parents took a toll on him. He refused to go to school. Refuse to utter more than a sentence to anyone. I did not know him personally back then but I’ve heard from his former schoolmates that he changed drastically.”

From Taeyeon’s description, that doesn’t really sound like the Junmyeon he knew. The Junmyeon that he knew would get angry if Chanyeol had ditched a day of school. He too would be the one greeting every passer-by whenever they rode their bicycles.

However, one does not underestimate what traumatic event can change a person’s whole life.

“And then one day… someone died.”

Chanyeol almost chokes on his drink at the sentence. “Did you said ‘died’?”

“Yes. The police found the doctor on the ground, with blood everywhere. According to what the people said, Junmyeon only sat beside her as his nightgown soaked in red.”

The virtual image of the story makes Chanyeol’s stomach churns. He can’t imagine Junmyeon, a 16-year-old Junmyeon having to witness death twice. “What happened to her?”

Taeyeon looks straight into Chanyeol’s eyes before she answers. “She was stabbed. Right through her stomach and chest with a pocket knife.”

Chills run over Chanyeol’s body at the gruesome description. It can’t be… “Then, the rumours…”

“Yes.” Taeyeon breathes out. “People has been saying that it was Junmyeon who killed the doctor.”

“No.” Chanyeol refuses to believe. “Junmyeon wouldn’t have.”

The woman only shrugs. “It’s what the people said.”

“Why would they say that?!” Chanyeol retorts. Someone like Junmyeon who thinks twice about killing a fly couldn’t possibly had done it.

“The doctor was… someone who this town was proud of. You’ve heard of Dr. Ami?”

Chanyeol gasps inaudibly. _That’s_ who took care of Junmyeon?! “ _The_ Dr. Ami?!”

When Chanyeol just entered high school, Dr Ami was this town’s favourite. She was like a celebrity. Due to this town being small and less developed as compared to the other municipalities around, this town is almost invisible.

However, Dr Ami made her name by being one of the members of a vaccine research team. She was the model of everyone’s dreams. Every parent uses her name to make sure their kids studied hard. _‘Make us proud like Ami’_ was the common phrase of this town. In other places, she might not shine the brightest but here in this small town, she was worshipped.

“The town lost such an important idol. Of course, they’d be upset.” Taeyeon mumbles sadly as she remembers the devastating news. “More so when the police decided not to investigate the case any further. They felt like justice had not been served.”

“The police didn’t investigate it?”

“They said they did. They came to the conclusion that it was suicide and closed the case immediately. Plus, there wasn’t any evidence that Junmyeon did it. More than anything, I think the people are angry that the case was closed so quickly.”

Taeyeon didn’t lie. It’s a heavy story indeed. It’s the one that Chanyeol knows he will have trouble sleeping. Even worse, he thinks that he won’t be able to hide from Junmyeon that he knows the truth.

As heavy as it is, Chanyeol still feels like there is more to it. Could the rumours be true?

If it is, why did Junmyeon had to go that far?

If it isn’t, why didn’t Junmyeon tell the truth?

“I know how you’re feeling.” Taeyeon says after seeing the expression on Chanyeol’s face. “I didn’t believe them. They said if anyone gets too close to him, you’ll get hurt. I don’t think it’s true.”

“How long have you known him?”

“Since he was nineteen.” The woman hums before she stands up from the sofa. Approaching Chanyeol’s beer bag, she lifts a bottle and glances at Chanyeol as if asking if he minded. Chanyeol waves his hand in approval. “He approached me saying that he wants to work. But no one wanted to let him. So I came up with the idea of this whole tailor business.” Taeyeon owns a small tailoring business as a side income. She hires no one else but Junmyeon and of course, it is kept as a secret. Or else, the customers wouldn’t have approved of Junmyeon touching their clothes.

It might seem unfair that Taeyeon is taking all the credit but Taeyeon makes sure that Junmyeon’s effort is paid. Besides, it’s the only way for Junmyeon to work and the blond has no objection.

Chanyeol can’t deny it. That’s brilliant. Staring at the woman who is taking a sip from the bottle, he guesses Taeyeon has a kind heart. Not many people are willing to be at risk of hated by the town.

But… Chanyeol would have done the same.

“Now that you know the truth, how do you feel?”

There’s a lump in Chanyeol’s heart after the revelation. He can’t help thinking about the _‘what if_ ’s. What if Chanyeol had known all of this earlier? What if Chanyeol pries further and discovers the truth?

What if the truth isn’t what he hoped for?

Then again, it happened a decade ago. Bringing that up would open some healed wounds. Chanyeol after all is as good as oblivious to what’s happening to this town. It might have been better if it stays that way.

“He still is the same guy that I was with 11 years ago.” Chanyeol clenches his jaw while twirling the bottle in his hands. “At least that’s what I can say after meeting him today.”

Somehow, relief washes over Taeyeon’s face. Almost as if she’s thankful that Chanyeol didn’t have a change of heart towards Junmyeon.

He wouldn’t.

What he got from the story isn’t the fear of Junmyeon. In fact, he wants to be closer to Junmyeon.

Chanyeol puts on his coat and gloves. He sighs looking at his wristwatch. His father had said that he will send a couple of maids for him here. Despite Chanyeol’s hope to live alone, he can’t deny that Chanyeol is not flair in cooking nor cleaning. He might have needed a few hands, especially in this huge house.

“Sir, where should I take you?” His butler who had arrived this morning opens the door for him.

“To get some groceries. There was a place where I used to go.” Chanyeol says as he makes his way to his car. “You don’t have to drive me there. I can go by myself.” The man nods as he hurriedly opens the garage door so that his master can drive the car out.

When the garage door is lifted up, the first thing they see is a rabbit sitting in the middle of the entrance. A very white one and yet distinctive from the blanket of snow. Seems like the rabbit got startled as the creature flinched. “Shoo! Shoo!” The butler chases the rabbit away. With its tiny little feet, the rabbit flees and disappears into the woods.

 _How adorable_ , Chanyeol thinks. Suddenly he is reminded how Junmyeon’s favourite animal is a rabbit. He adored rabbits like there was no tomorrow. Due to that, any encounter with the said animal will always remind Chanyeol of Junmyeon. It happens that there are a lot of things that remind him of Junmyeon.

“Drive safely, Sir.”

Chanyeol nods before he waves the old man goodbye.

The first place he went to is to the kitchenware store. Chanyeol needed some new mugs, plates and kitchen utensils. A little silly of him but he wants to buy some that match the aesthetic of his house. One might believe that Chanyeol would be permanently moving into that house.

Well, who knows he might be extending his stay.

After spending a long time in the kitchenware store, Chanyeol decides to stroll around the places that he cherished as a kid. The ones he remembers. Sometimes, Chanyeol is grateful that he moved away at the age of 15. If he did at the age younger than that, he might find it hard to remember this place as well as he does now.

His last stop for today is the grocery market. It wasn’t the only market but it was his mother’s go-to. With a trolley in his hands, he strolls from isle to isle. Strange. The last time he went here, his mother did all the picking while Chanyeol’s role was to carry the groceries into the car. Now, he’s picking them up for the house.

_I miss you, mother._

Speaking of his past, he accidentally remembered a one piece of valuable memory where Junmyeon and him had an undying love with eating marshmallow stuffed biscuits. This town is small and there are not many shops that sell them. One shop however is known to have the best one in town.

Perhaps Chanyeol could get one for himself and Junmyeon.

It was a little fuzzy but eventually, after scanning the streets and shops, it slowly comes together in his head the exact location of the stall that used to sell those. He fears that the shop might have relocated somewhere else but after finding the familiar logo, Chanyeol grins.

“Good evening.” Chanyeol greets the owner standing behind the counter. He expected to see the old woman who Chanyeol used to make fun of her puffy hair. Instead, it’s a young man who is welcoming him. Unfortunately, he doesn’t recognize this man anywhere. “Hello. Do you have trouble choosing?”

“Ah, it’s not that.” Chanyeol shakes his head. He is just amazed at how much the menu has changed. Back then, this stall had only sold two types of baked sweets. Now there are more jars of different type of sweets. It’s not surprising consider how long time has passed. “I’ll have each jar. Two for the marshmallow biscuits.”

The man’s eyes turn wide. “All of them?”

Chanyeol nods. It would be delightful to try various different food. After all, Chanyeol has a sweet tooth which makes him weak for anything sweet. Furthermore, according to the board, it is still Grandma May’s recipe and Chanyeol trusts her to make his stomach happy.

“Can I ask a question?” Chanyeol hands the man his money.

“Yes?”

“Grandma May. She’s still alive, right?” Chanyeol asks hesitantly. He worries that the question might have come out as insensitive. Maybe Chanyeol should have worded that better.

The man lets out a strained smile. “Are you an acquaintance of her?”

“You could say that.” He answers awkwardly. “It’s been a while.”

“The name is Joowon.” He offers his hand to which Chanyeol unhesitant to take. “Her grandson.”

It’s a bit odd. Chanyeol may have gone a long time but he remembers clearly that Grandma May was never married. Certainly, she does not have any successor nor a grandson. “About Grandma May, it’s been 2 years.” He mutters solemnly.

Instantly, Chanyeol knows what he meant. “I’m sorry.” He sends his condolences. A sudden weight pulls down in Chanyeol’s heart. He’s been away for 11 years and so far, he has heard 4 deaths. Now, Chanyeol is afraid that the count will get higher.

He is brought back from his trance when a kid accidentally elbowed him to the side. “Oh, I’m sorry, sir.” The kid bows before turning to Joowon. “The marshmallow biscuits, 2 containers.” He says, already holding out the money.

“Already buying two more? You were here yesterday.” Joowon teases as he puts two containers into a paper bag.

“It’s not for me!” The kid says. He’s probably around the age of 10 or 11, Chanyeol guesses. “Some strange man asked me to buy these for him.”

_Strange man?_

“You know you’re not supposed to talk to strangers. Although this town is known for its peacefulness, it’s important to be cautious.” Joowon advises. He has a point. What grown man would ask a random child to help buy two containers of sweets? _Strange_ , indeed.

“I will. I will!” The kid replies. He thanks Joowon for the goods and once again, he apologizes to Chanyeol for accidentally pushed him. Chanyeol only waves his hand to dismiss it but he can’t help from feeling concern over the kid.

 _Hmmm_ , Chanyeol’s probably overthinking it.

He’s already walking the other way towards his parked car. However, the uneasiness doesn’t leave his heart. Turning around, he watches how the previous kid is skipping as he walks down the street.

_‘Strange man.’_

Just then, the kid makes a sharp turn into a dark alley. _Huh_? It’s instinctive that Chanyeol begins moving the opposite way as he follows the boy’s trace. In danger or not, it’s better for Chanyeol to check the situation rather than hearing unpleasant news the next morning. He jogs with the groceries in his hand before stopping in front of the alley.

What he found is such a concerning sight. Some mysterious hooded man is on one knee and patting the little boy’s head. Chanyeol’s eyebrow furrows in confusion. Who still wears hooded robes these days? A dark blue colour at that. The minute Chanyeol arrives, the hooded man instantly hides his face, raising further suspicion. “What is happening here?” Chanyeol questions.

“Oh! It’s the sir from before!” The kid points to Chanyeol.

“Little kid, you shouldn’t be talking to strangers in a dark place.” Chanyeol scolds him.

The little boy pouts. “I was just helping.”

Helping or not, this is still dangerous. He was about to pull the boy to his side when the hooded figure stands in a rush. “It’s my fault. I asked him for help.”

That voice. It sounded… a little too familiar. When their eyes meet, Chanyeol unconsciously let out a slight gasp. “Junmyeon?”

The other too is as shocked as he is. “Chanyeol?”

Glancing at the paper bag in Junmyeon’s hand, it seems he is indeed the strange man that the kid was referring to.

After recovering from the surprise, Junmyeon crouches next to the boy, turning the kid to face him. “You’ve done well. Thank you so much for helping me.” He ruffles the boy’s head. He nods his head proudly before running pass Chanyeol.

Now that it’s just the two of them, Chanyeol takes a good look at Junmyeon. Why is he wearing a head to toe hooded cloak? Chanyeol understands it’s because of winter but who wears a cloak these days especially an old one?

“Please don’t scold him. He was just doing as I say.” Junmyeon pleads.

After looking at Junmyeon, the “danger of a stranger” instantly flies over Chanyeol’s head. “Why are you dressed like that?” Chanyeol asks the first question that he’s curious of.

“Ah, this.” Junmyeon clutches his cloak. “I uhm… I fancy it like this. Even if it is old.”

Chanyeol can’t say anything to that. If Junmyeon had said it’s because he has no money to buy a coat, it’s more believable. Plus, Chanyeol would’ve gifted him a newly designed one in a heartbeat. It’s better than him dressing like in the medieval period.

“Are you grocery shopping?” Junmyeon asks when his gaze flickers to the bag that Chanyeol is carrying.

“Yes. And for a few stuff at home.” Chanyeol answers. It’s a little awkward between them because of where they left off. “You should come by.”

At the offer, Junmyeon smiles. “I would love to someday.”

Due to the cold, Chanyeol offers Junmyeon to take him home. It comes to Chanyeol’s surprise when Junmyeon reveals that had walked here. That’s 45 minutes worth of walking! Despite Junmyeon insisting that he’ll walk home, Chanyeol gave the blond no choice as he takes Junmyeon’s paper bag in his hands. The taller refused to give it back unless Junmyeon agreed.

Without much choice, Junmyeon finally nods as he gives in to Chanyeol’s request.

“You don’t have a bicycle?” Chanyeol asks when they are walking towards Chanyeol’s car.

Junmyeon shakes his head. “I need to get it fixed. I’m not sure how though.”

“I can help you!”

At Chanyeol’s enthusiasm, Junmyeon chuckles. “What are you? My hero in shining armour?”

The taller shrugs. “I used to be, right?” Perhaps, saying that would be less embarrassing when they were younger. Hearing that now must have made Junmyeon’s toes curl.

“I was really dependent on you back then, weren’t I?” Junmyeon laughs. However, once he did, he notices that a few people are staring at him. Junmyeon is already used to the disgust directed at him but with Chanyeol’s presence, he grows self-conscious.

Glancing to his side, Junmyeon wants to see if Chanyeol had noticed it too. It would be weird if he didn’t. Some passers-by are even stopping just to stare at them. _Ah…_ He should have known better. Junmyeon should have made more effort to refuse Chanyeol’s offer.

Suddenly, Chanyeol wraps his right arm around Junmyeon’s back and brings Junmyeon to walk faster. “Let’s hurry to the car.” Chanyeol says, fastening his steps.

At the close proximity, Junmyeon feels a little warm in his cheeks. It’s been years of him without having someone in this close proximity to him. It’s a little startling and… embarrassing. This is not something to be shy about but Junmyeon can’t help it. Concealing his expression, he hopes Chanyeol didn’t notice that he flinched.

Thank God it wasn’t that far. Once both of them are already in the car, Chanyeol turns on the heater. “You must be cold.”

Junmyeon gulps. He can’t remember when the last time he had ridden a car anywhere was. It’s been so… so long. Not even the bus. All he had was his bicycle and that’s about it. Through hot sunny days, pouring rain and the cold air, it was just him and his two-wheeled vehicle. Therefore, Junmyeon couldn’t help the smile on his face as he tries to cover it with his palm.

“I guess the cloak really knows how to attract attention.” Chanyeol laughs a little while starting the engine.

 _Oh, Chanyeol…_ It’s not the cloak that people are looking at, Junmyeon wanted to say. It’s the person that’s wearing it. Perhaps it would’ve been better that this is the last time that they both are seen in the same frame together.

"I'm sorry." Junmyeon apologizes. "It is uhm... might've been better if I walked home."

 _Nonsense_ , Chanyeol wanted to say. Instead, he just shakes his head as he starts to drive. "You are already seated in my car. Do not fret." Chanyeol says.

Throughout the trip home, Junmyeon keeps smiling. Chanyeol's not sure why but he was in a good mood. Was it the biscuits? Due to the latter's jolliness, Chanyeol finds it easy to converse with Junmyeon. To be completely honest, it still feels like there's a gap between them but that's not surprising. Slowly but surely, Chanyeol will try to decrease the gap.

"How much do you remember of this place?” Junmyeon suddenly asks.

If Chanyeol were a kid when he moved, he probably wouldn't remember that much. But there are moments of his high school days where he remembers it vividly. Most of them are with Junmyeon. "A lot of them. Why?"

"Nothing. Haven't you met any of our high school friends?" Junmyeon fiddles with the hem of his cloak. "They might want to see you."

Chanyeol snorts. "Did you forget? My friends are your friends. Most of them only tolerated me because I was your best friend."

“That’s not true.”

Actually, it is. It was Junmyeon who was everyone’s good friend. He was a social butterfly and despite Chanyeol having a fair share of his friend but he wasn’t dependable like Junmyeon. He wasn’t _loved_ like Junmyeon and that was not a problem. He was already contented with a certain blond who cares for him. “I didn’t come back to meet everyone.” Chanyeol shrugs, making a turn into Junmyeon’s driveway.

Snow is already settling thicker than yesterday.

“Then, what did you come back for?” Junmyeon asks in a soft whisper.

For what did he come back for?

It’s for a few things actually. Inspiration. For himself to reconnect with the man he was. For sentimental purposes. However, the most prominent factor was undeniably…

… the man next to him.

What Junmyeon didn’t know is that Chanyeol was cleaning his parents’ house one day when he stumbles upon boxes full of letters. He spent hours reading the letters and went through his childhood pictures. From when he was a kindergartener until he’s in high school, he was always with a certain small blond man.

There are many times that Chanyeol contemplate about visiting his hometown again but he never went through with it because nothing was waiting for him there. However, the night he spent reminiscing back his childhood memories, Chanyeol’s mind had made a decision.

He wants to go back.

For that reason, he is here. Back with the man who used to mean a lot to him.

“I miss this place.” Chanyeol answers just that.

Seemingly satisfied with the answer, Junmyeon nods before he clicks the door open. “Well, thank you, Chanyeol, for the ride home. Sorry to have bothered you.”

“You didn’t, Junmyeon. I’m glad to help you.” Chanyeol insists.

Even when Chanyeol had said that, Junmyeon keeps having a guilty look on his face. The blond male takes all his paper bag in his hands with a huff. Chanyeol did offer to help him but as he expected, the shorter was immediate to turn him down. “I’ll see you around, Chanyeol.”

“Okay.” With that, Chanyeol watches Junmyeon walks to his doorstep with his cloak sweeping the snow on the ground. Already a week of stay here and the questions he has regarding Junmyeon keeps on increasing. If only Chanyeol knows his story.

The story that only Junmyeon knew. Maybe figuring Junmyeon out would be easier.

“Hey, Junmyeon!” Chanyeol peeks his head outside of the car window.

The blond was just about to enter his house when he hears Chanyeol calling his name. “Yes?” Junmyeon turns around.

“Come over to my house whenever you want. I think I would like to have a familiar company around me a little more.”

At Chanyeol’s words, Junmyeon instantly breaks into a shy smile. He usually covers it with his palm but when the man’s hands are occupied, instead, he lifts his groceries for them to block his smiling lips instead. “Alright!” He shouts back.

_That’s a promise then_ , Chanyeol too smiles.

Glancing at his wristwatch, Chanyeol groans as his shoulder sags in his seat. It’s been an hour of him sitting in his office and yet, he is still staring at the blank page of his notebook. He thought by now he would already have some inspiration or motivation to come up with some ideas but his head is still empty. Embarrassingly none. Every time he finds a new idea, he crossed them out minutes later.

This is the worst writer’s block he has ever gone through. Is it even possible to get it done while he’s here?

Maybe he should take a walk.

Putting on a thick cardigan and scarf, he decided to just take a stroll outside at his garden. It’s one of the things he loved to do as a teenager. Just as he descends down the stairs, suddenly his butler approaches him. “Sir, Kim Taeyeon is here to see you.”

 _Taeyeon?_ What is she doing here at this hour? It’s almost 9 pm. Chanyeol walks to the living room to see Taeyeon is already seated there. “Hello.”

“Hi!” Taeyeon stands up upon noticing him. “Oh, are you heading somewhere?”

“Was about to take a walk at the garden. Can I help you?” Chanyeol asks. Judging from her expression, it seems like she has plenty to talk about. Is it something very serious? Perhaps, it is. “Want to join me?” Chanyeol proposes.

Taeyeon contemplates before she answers. “I would love to.”

Once they’re outside, Chanyeol pockets his hands into his cardigan. Unlike Taeyeon, he didn’t wear his gloves. The garden looked well-taken care of, thanks to Taeyeon. It’s a good thing that his father sold the house to Taeyeon’s family. “What do I owe for your visit here?” Chanyeol asks as they are walking side by side.

Before she answers, she lets out a puff of air. It’s visible due to the cold weather. “The town is talking about you.” She says.

It’s not surprising that they talked but it’s shocking that it is this early. “Already?” He had only just gone out this evening.

“Because of Junmyeon.”

Of course. No wonder words travel fast. It always does when someone has a bad reputation. “What did they say?” Taeyeon seems hesitant to answer. To this reason, Chanyeol nudges her side, urging that it’s fine to tell him. “Are they saying that I’m Junmyeon’s partner in crime or something along that?” After all, someone would recognize that he used to be Junmyeon’s close friend. He’s not surprised if the townspeople thought of that.

“They’re saying that they have to save you.”

Chanyeol’s steps put to a stop. “Save me?”

The woman looks at him with a frown. “They think that Junmyeon will harm you if you linger around him any longer. Of course, they knew you were his good friend. That’s why they pity you.”

They pity him?

Is this what people get for being in the same frame as Junmyeon? Now it made sense as to why Junmyeon needed to ask a kid to help him on such simple things. Any grown adult would have repulsed him. The sudden realization is starting to make Chanyeol’s heart boils. “Do they really believe that?”

“Chanyeol, the town… they really believe that Junmyeon is a killer.”

“Well, he’s not, right?!” Chanyeol seethes through his gritted teeth.

Sensing Chanyeol’s anger, Taeyeon pauses a little. “You know I believed that too. But... no one can vouch for the truth.”

“It’s stupid.” Thinking back to Junmyeon’s smile when he offered him to come by, it wasn’t sinister. It was the bashful kind. Innocent and sweet just like he remembers of Junmyeon. “They’re wrong. If they weren’t, you wouldn’t have been here. He would’ve murdered you already.”

“That’s precisely why I told you I do not believe them.” Taeyeon replies with a frown. The reason why she doesn’t get crap from the townspeople is that no one knew that Taeyeon and Junmyeon are sorts of friends. If they did, she bets she will receive the same treatment as Junmyeon. “I’m just saying, Chanyeol. People will come to you and will talk you out of it.” They wouldn’t be suspicious of Chanyeol like they would have been with Taeyeon if she was seen with Junmyeon. Thanks to the fact that Chanyeol just came back after 11 years.

“Then what am I supposed to do?”

“Just do what I do, ignore them. But I need you to also be cautious. Not of Junmyeon, but of your surroundings. Don’t make people talk more than they already have.” Taeyeon advises. Her forehead crinkles with worry laced in her tone.

How does she suppose for Chanyeol to do that? Now that Chanyeol thinks about it, this town… is not at all beneficial for Junmyeon. Why doesn’t he move somewhere else?

… Perhaps, he isn’t capable of that. Then again, Junmyeon would have nowhere to go. Plus, there’s no way Junmyeon would leave his parents’ house. That house, after all, is the remaining good memory of Junmyeon and his family.

Sighh… Chanyeol didn’t think he would come back to such a situation. He thought showing his face here after 11 years is just… easy. It never crossed his mind that he’ll be having so many question marks above his head.

“Since you said it like that, I think we shouldn’t be seen publicly.” Chanyeol releases a sigh. Not at all because he’s afraid of those eyes on him, Chanyeol could care less. But thinking how uncomfortable Junmyeon seemed when everyone was staring at them, he wouldn’t want a repetition of that for Junmyeon. Chanyeol has an idea it’s not because the eyes were on him. Chanyeol’s positive that it’s because Junmyeon felt guilty towards Chanyeol. “I think he would want that.”

Taeyeon gives him an apologetic look. “It’s for the best, I guess.”

Both of them walks even further in silence. It’s really sad that other than Taeyeon, there’s no one else that Junmyeon can confide to. Not to mention that Taeyeon is a busy person. Whenever she’s not around, Junmyeon must have been so… lonely.

“I have to head back. It’s late.” Taeyeon insists after glancing at Chanyeol’s wristwatch.

Right. It isn’t proper for a lady to be out at such time. Chanyeol nods as he ushers Taeyeon to her car. “Thank you for stopping by.” Chanyeol wishes after making sure that Taeyeon is comfortable in her car.

“No problem. Have a good night, Chanyeol.” With one last wave of a hand, Taeyeon drives away.

Now it’s just Chanyeol and his thoughts again. It’s heavy. All these unanswered questions. The sudden attention. The limitation he has to put up. Will it be like this throughout his visit? Chanyeol can’t lie, he was picturing it differently in his mind before he came here. It would be just like the reunion in films. Chanyeol pictured himself knocking on the door to Junmyeon’s house and the blonde man would shout in glee to see him. After exchanging their current stories, Junmyeon would take Chanyeol around town to give him a tour on what has changed and what hasn’t. Eventually, both of them would rekindle the past and maybe things would look splendid for Chanyeol.

That was what he had imagined countless times in his head…

…

… And yet, it’s far away from reality.

Instead of going inside, Chanyeol walks to the back gate of his house where it’s leading to the woods. The night is really cold and Chanyeol regrets not having his gloves with him. He keeps blowing warm air towards his palms. Upon arriving at the back gate, Chanyeol smiles while scanning the black and worn-out metal. This gate has been through a lot. When he was younger, Chanyeol went to Junmyeon’s house so often that the gate was rarely locked with a padlock.

There was one time when Chanyeol was grounded, he wasn’t allowed to meet Junmyeon. He remembers his father had changed the padlock into a new one where Chanyeol doesn’t have the key for it. Despite that, Chanyeol earned himself another month of punishment due to him climbing on the gate to cross the woods to meet Junmyeon.

Shaking his head, he was really a rebellious kid back then. He was young. Both of them were.

As he was busy reminiscing the past, his eyes caught a movement just in front of him.


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: part two!

13.3k words

* * *

Looking up, he notices a white ball of fur just a few steps away from him.

The place isn’t too dark. The lights were bright enough to shine to the trees further from the gate. That's how he manages to identify the fluffy thing is actually a rabbit.

Unusual.

15 years of living here and Chanyeol had never encountered any rabbits in the woods. None. How odd for it to appear here. Now that he thinks about it, he did see one this morning. Perhaps there is a community of it somewhere in the woods. That would be possible. Back then, Junmyeon might have been super thrilled if he were to find a group of bunnies living in the woods but sadly, there are only monitor lizards here. What if the rabbit belongs to Junmyeon? He found one this morning and it could be the same one.

With that thought in mind, Chanyeol opens the gate. As soon as he did, the little creature flinched. "Here, little bunny." Chanyeol tries to call it.

The rabbit stayed motionless.

Lighting up the oil lamp beside him, he takes the lamp and steps outside the gate. When Chanyeol takes a few steps, the rabbit didn't move at all. However, once Chanyeol is close enough, it starts hopping a few feet away from Chanyeol.

"Oi!" Chanyeol shouts. Shaking his head, he was thinking of just leaving the rabbit be... until he sees the white thing staring at him. It may be weird for Chanyeol to say this but that rabbit is looking at him intently. As if there's something more to it but Chanyeol doesn't understand what it is. Again, he takes a few steps closer with the lamp being hoisted up. Just as he was close enough, the bunny hops away again. "Are you playing with me, little guy?" Chanyeol huffs. Surprisingly, Chanyeol finds it entertaining that he's playing tag with this little thing. Not to mention how cute the rabbit's butt is when it hops.

After some time, Chanyeol finally succeeds in getting closer to the rabbit. He didn't crouch down because that might scare the poor thing away. Instead, he stands just above the fluffy thing. "Are you Junmyeon's?" Chanyeol says. A bit weird considering Chanyeol is asking to an _animal_ , not a human.

However, to his amazement, the rabbit hops closer to his feet and nuzzles his face on Chanyeol's ankles. "Is that a yes?" Chanyeol amuses.

Glancing to the back, he has walked quite into the woods and Chanyeol didn't even realize it. Oh, well. Putting down his lamp, Chanyeol bends down to try and touch the animal. Thank God for this time, the rabbit didn't cower away. It let Chanyeol brushes the head and also its back.

How soft.

"Do you mind if I pick you up?" Chanyeol asks as if the rabbit will nod to him.

Hoisting it up, Chanyeol let the little ball of fur rests in his arms. Such a cute little animal! He has always thought of bunnies such as precious little creatures. Petting the rabbit seems to be making it purr. "You like that?" Chanyeol laughs at how the rabbit's eyes are closed in contentment.

It's like a baby.

Just when Chanyeol is carrying it like a baby, he notices something strange. At the rabbit's stomach, there are three marks of lines on its belly. It's very huge and noticeable even in this dark lighting. Chanyeol's face changes instantly. "Hey little guy, what happened to your stomach?"

As soon as Chanyeol said that, the rabbit begins to fidget aggressively in his hand. It even startled Chanyeol. After placing it on the ground, in a blink of an eye, the rabbit hops away further deep into the woods.

How strange.

Chanyeol has no energy to chase it even further. Not when he is not properly equipped to go into the dark woods. Picking up his oil lamp, he turns around to head back to the gate. Thinking about the rabbit, it reminds him of Junmyeon. It wouldn't be a surprise if he found out later that it belongs to Junmyeon. The blond loves them too much.

Speaking of Junmyeon, should Chanyeol see him tomorrow? Would it be weird if they see each other again after a day?

Then again, he was one of the purposes as to why Chanyeol is here.

It should be fine...

Chanyeol finds himself at Junmyeon's doorstep 2 days later. Yes, he was contemplating whether he shouldn't seem too eager to see Junmyeon or just follow his instinct. He gave it a thought, probably wait in a week’s time to meet up with Junmyeon again but Chanyeol couldn't find himself to wait that long. After all, his house is just there!

It didn't take a lot of knocking before Junmyeon opens the door with a surprise expression. "Chanyeol!" The blond male gushes.

"Good morning! Do you mind if I come in?"

Junmyeon shakes his head. "No, not at all!" He welcomes the tall man in.

Just like his previous visit, the hallway is a little dark until he gets to the living room where all the sunshine are at. On the couch and table, there are a lot of dresses and shirts messily folded. Chanyeol guesses that Junmyeon is working seeing how his sewing kits are scattered on the table.

"I'm sorry. It is a bit messy. If I had known you were coming..."

"It's fine." Chanyeol says. "I should've told you beforehand."

Junmyeon eyes the living room apologetically. He didn't realize he was living in such a mess. For the whole night, he was working on a few clothes with barely any breaks in between because Taeyeon will be coming soon. He should've thought twice before inviting Chanyeol in.

"It's untidy down here. Why don't we go up?"

_Oh..._

Chanyeol hasn't gone up the 2nd floor yet. He nods eagerly as he looks forward to seeing how the house has changed after 11 years.

Junmyeon clasps his hands together nervously as he ushers Chanyeol to the floor above. It's not particularly messy up there but Chanyeol might find it overwhelmingly different from what he remembered.

Reaching the top, it _is_ different from what Chanyeol remembers. Junmyeon's mother loved teacups and back then, she had a cabinet of her teacup collection. However, all that is left now is just an empty shelf. 11 years ago, as soon as someone arrives at the top of the stairs, they would see an eclectic designed living room. This part of the house was the Kim's family hall of fame. His mother had her teacups collection. His father with his fishing hobby achievements. Meanwhile, Junmyeon's side was filled with his arts and the trophies he won from art competitions.

That was how Chanyeol remembered 11 years ago.

And now...

There is nothing on the wall. There are barely even anything left except for an old empty cabinet and a small table with a lonely chair. Chanyeol tries his best to control his astonishment but he thinks Junmyeon is able to see right through him.

"It's not much up here. I had some stuff thrown away." Junmyeon mutters, a little embarrassed. Not exactly thrown but he had to sell them for his survival. The only things that are left in this house are basically just what he needed to get by. After all, Junmyeon had never thought about having any guest into his house. "I'll make you something to drink." Junmyeon hurriedly excuses himself.

Some part of Chanyeol dies a little at seeing the difference from years ago. Even the colour of the walls has gone extremely dull. There are holes and discolouration with the wallpapers. Everything looks old. Chanyeol should have come back sooner. This was once a place that Chanyeol loves so much. Now, it feels like a completely different house. A colourless house void of any warmth.

Why has it come to this?

Not long later, Junmyeon comes back with a tray of drinks. Despite this bleak house, Junmyeon carefully walks to him with a smile on his face. Then Chanyeol remembers. The house may have been different but Junmyeon beaming at him as he brings Chanyeol something to drink is the familiar warmth he got years ago.

"I hope tea again is fine. I don't have coffee." The blond places the tray on the small table. "But if you like coffee, I can ask Taeyeon to get some soon."

"Tea is fine already." Chanyeol quickly assures him.

Junmyeon nods as he pours Chanyeol a cup. He is still a little unsettled judging from the worry on his face. The blond places a plate of saltine crackers next to Chanyeol's tea. "I hope you don't mind just this. If you come by next time, I promise it would be better. I'll have Taeyeon buy—"

"Hey." Chanyeol calls him with a gentle tone, successfully cutting of Junmyeon's rambling. "You don't have to. This is fine, really."

 _Is it really_ , Junmyeon internally frowns. Chanyeol probably had thought that he would be served with some delicious drink and a splendid smelling toast just like how he would be back then. The taller probably misses that and that is why he is here. But instead, what Junmyeon manages to serve the latter is just... no fragrance tea and stale crackers. Junmyeon’s grip on the tray hardens. "I'm just... sorry."

"Why?" Chanyeol wonders. He doesn't like the frown forming on Junmyeon's lips.

Junmyeon looks like he wanted to answer but then, he decides the opposite. "Nothing." He settles for that.

Chanyeol didn't say anything further. He really means it when he says he doesn't mind. After all, he's here for Junmyeon and only him. It takes him a while to realize that he's actually missing the shorter male. Seeing the blond is already making Chanyeol's heart feel at ease. "So, what will you be doing later?" Chanyeol asks as he takes the teacup to his mouth.

"Later? Probably finishing a little work I have left then I will be waiting for Taeyeon."

 _Hmm_. The shorter has been mentioning Taeyeon quite a lot. It makes sense that Junmyeon is very dependent on Taeyeon but he wonders… being so close with Taeyeon for years... is there really nothing between them?

"You seem really close to Taeyeon." Chanyeol mumbles, placing his cup back on the table.

"Uh? Well. It seems that way." Junmyeon shrugs. "She's the only person I talk to."

 _Ah... that's true_. In that case, won't that make her more special in Junmyeon's eyes? At that thought, Chanyeol felt his throat getting dry despite just gulping his drink. "I suppose you would be fond of her."

"Do you mean in a romantic way?" Junmyeon asks.

It's Chanyeol's turn to shrug. "Perhaps."

Junmyeon silently stares at him for a few seconds before he breaks into a small laugh. "I haven't thought about it like that." He hugs the tray tighter to his chest. "Admiration for someone... It's been a while since I've felt that. The last time was..." He pauses, eyes meeting with the taller male’s.

Chanyeol waits for Junmyeon to finish his sentence. He looks expectantly for Junmyeon's answer, only for the blond to clear his throat and looks away. "...It was a long time ago."

If it was a long time ago, then, Chanyeol knows exactly the answer. Maybe that's why Junmyeon is hesitant to look at him.

Because both of them _knew_ what he meant.

"Do you still draw?" Chanyeol asks out of the blue. The taller got curious. It's not like Junmyeon had planned to make a living with his art skills but the blond was exceptionally good that it earns him a lot of praises. Though... Chanyeol wonders what happened to those trophies on the shelves.

Junmyeon probably knew that's the reason Chanyeol asked because the shorter male's eyes flicker to the shelf behind him. "It's been a while... But I plan to start again."

That's great for Chanyeol to hear. At least he didn't abandon his talent. Chanyeol has always loved the fact that Junmyeon likes to draw.

Other than getting a sketch of him for free, staring at Junmyeon while the male has a concentrated gaze on the paper was Chanyeol’s favourite part above all. He finds it endearing whenever there was a comfortable silence between them as Junmyeon draws and Chanyeol writes.

They could do it again.

"Let's go to the lakeside like old times. You draw while I write." Chanyeol suggests. He fears that Junmyeon would reject his offer. After all, sometimes it's a little too much to dive in the past when things have changed tremendously.

Thankfully, Junmyeon's eyes spark in interest as he nods. "I would love that! Would you mind until I completed my work?”

"That'll do!" Chanyeol beams.

As Chanyeol was about to take another sip, his cell phone vibrates in his pocket. Excusing himself, he walks to the balcony to answer his phone at the same time Junmyeon said that he wants to change his shirt to a proper one. "Hello."

 _"Sir,"_ Oh, it's his butler at home. _"The maids that your father hired has arrived."_

"Splendid. Just show them to their room and I'll meet them later."

_"Very well, sir."_

With that, the line is cut off. Chanyeol takes an intake of air. Even if he said he didn't want any maids but his father had deemed it necessary. Maybe it's an excuse to keep tabs on him, he's not surprised. As the only son, it's understandable that his father is overprotective.

Turning back inside, Junmyeon is already gone. Chanyeol's curiosity didn't lower as he walks around the living room area. Then, his eyes fall onto the master bedroom. It was where Junmyeon's parents slept in previously. Of course, Chanyeol isn't stupid and insensitive. He wouldn't trespass there no matter how nosy he can be. In fact, he had never even gone in there as a child.

It was Junmyeon's room where he spent most of the time.

Speaking of which, Chanyeol turns his heels around towards Junmyeon's room. His steps are as quiet as a mouse to see what has become of that room. Unexpectedly, the door to that room is slightly opened. This time, his curiosity got the best of him as he takes a peek inside.

He didn't expect to see Junmyeon in the room. He thought the male had gone downstairs to resolve something. However, Chanyeol's heart made a loud thump when he spots Junmyeon taking off his shirt, revealing his half-naked back.

Chanyeol gulps.

The shorter's skin remains as white as snow. The blond is crouching down, searching for something in his basket. A new shirt, Chanyeol guesses. What is astonishing is how scrawny Junmyeon's body is. Although Junmyeon has always been small, but he was a little chubbier back then. Chanyeol would pinch his hips just to annoy the blond.

But the view in front of him is very different. The man has lost a lot of weight and Chanyeol should have expected that from seeing Junmyeon's cheeks. But he didn't realize Junmyeon lost _that_ much.

Nothing prepared Chanyeol for another surprise as Junmyeon turns around, revealing his torso. Chanyeol's eyes widen at the slashes of wounds on Junmyeon's stomach. _What in the world..._ There are 3 huge lines of scar that made Chanyeol shivers. It’s pretty huge and dark, impossible to not catch any attention to his stomach.

Afraid to be caught any further, Chanyeol steps away from the door and goes to sit down on his seat again.

 _That_...

Those lines.... it looked familiar. Isn't that the lines on the bunny he met yesterday night?

Nope, it could be just coincidence but the same positioning is a little suspicious. The lines yesterday weren't at all in one direction like a claw mark. It was almost like an italic roman number. That's why it caught Chanyeol off-guard last night.

But now... it's a little weird to see it on a human's body.

 _I am probably just overthinking this_ , Chanyeol thought to himself.

Junmyeon wouldn't carve the same scar on his belly at a rabbit, would he? It could be one of the explanations but that would be _very_ disturbing.

"Chanyeol?" The sudden voice of Junmyeon startles him. Chanyeol turns around to see Junmyeon in a changed outfit. Seeing Chanyeol's shocked face, Junmyeon questions. "Is everything okay?"

Chanyeol's gaze unconsciously went down to Junmyeon's stomach. His mind displays again how the slightly dark mark decorates Junmyeon's pale skin. How did he get that? It's a question that Chanyeol couldn't just ask straightaway. "Nothing." He answers just that. "Just nothing."

"Alright. I'll be resuming my work. If you want to uhm... watch, you may do so. O...or do you want to do anything in the meantime."

"I'll watch." Chanyeol says.

"...okay." Junmyeon nods then beckons him to the stairs.

Although distracted in his head, Chanyeol follows Junmyeon down the stairs. Halfway down, Chanyeol just couldn't hold the question from his tongue. "Do you have a pet?" Chanyeol asks. It’s out of the blue evidently on Junmyeon's expression. "A rabbit maybe?"

Junmyeon stills for a moment. He didn't reply instantly but after a slight pause, Junmyeon glances at him. "Not that I could think of."

So, it's _not_ his rabbit.

That's... even weirder. If it's not his rabbit, then how come they have the same scars on the exact same place? His previous theory would make sense but if that's not his pet... then... what other explanation is there…

"Why do you ask?" Junmyeon looks at him with an unreadable expression. It's Junmyeon's turn to look at him curiously. Chanyeol felt like he should be careful with his answer. Does he just ask about Junmyeon's scar? Or should he tell him about his encounter with the rabbit that has the same exact scar?

In the end, Chanyeol braves a smile as he shakes his head. "Nothing. It would be less lonely with a pet."

He could be mistaken but Junmyeon's shoulder sags a little after Chanyeol had said that. Almost as if he had discreetly let out a sigh of relief. "Oh... I thought about it but it's a little hard to manage. In terms of their food."

"I see." Chanyeol replies.

The topic stops there. He decides that it is a question for another time. For now, he lets it wander at the back of his head.

Another day, another question is added into the list of things Park Chanyeol is wondering about Kim Junmyeon.

The day went by pretty well for both of them. Chanyeol wishes he could describe it better but it did go pretty good. Granted, Chanyeol's a little distracted but he adores the time that they sat by the frozen lake. It shouldn't be a surprise to find the bench a little shaky. It's been 11 years after all. However, Junmyeon picks up a small piece of paper and his pencil just like time hasn’t changed anything.

Chanyeol likes this sense of familiarity.

That is until he's back at home thinking about the mystery that unfolded this morning. If Chanyeol pushes aside the event with the rabbit, the cause of such huge scars on Junmyeon's stomach is still in question. After much thought, it might be true that a car accident was responsible for such deep wounds.

Then it brings back the question of how the rabbit got the exact same lines. It’s too odd to be a mere coincidence.

"Sir?"

Chanyeol's train of thoughts makes a stop as his name is being called. Glancing to his side, it is one of the maids that was hired to his household. She is actually a resident of this town. "Yes?"

"I asked if you'd like anything for dessert."

"Oh..." Chanyeol mutters, going back to his dish. "I think I am full. What was your name again?"

"Minji." She answers politely.

 _Minji_. This woman, she seems quite young. And energetic too. Of course, youth...

"Where are you from, Minji?"

"The southern region." She chirps with a radiant smile.

 _I see..._ Well, Chanyeol decides not to pry further. The girl then excuses herself while carrying Chanyeol's plate. Sigh. He's not used to this, having maids and butler. At his own house, he lived rather independently. Then again, a house as big as this, it would be hard for Chanyeol to maintain it on his own.

He spent the rest of the night in his office room. As compared to his previous attempt, he actually managed to write an outline of his story. Although, he wouldn't really say it's the final one. He still feels like something is missing. There's no hook. No flavour. Lack of sincerity.

What is this slump he is feeling?

The dark walls in his room seem to get more suffocating as he sits there longer. Chanyeol ends up taking the fresh air at his favourite spot of this whole house.

The balcony.

It's very... nice to have the cold air hitting his face. He has always liked winter as a contrast to some people. While gazing at the frozen lake, the rooftop of a certain house catches his attention.

Today's time with Junmyeon proved Chanyeol one thing.

That it's never enough with Junmyeon. _Time_ is never enough when it comes to Junmyeon because Chanyeol finds himself hesitant to part ways with Junmyeon. He is only realizing it now. What he felt years ago, he didn’t think he would be feeling it again. Today is especially excruciating. Chanyeol had such a fantastic evening with Junmyeon as the other laughed at his stories about the city. It wasn’t one of those comfortable silence moment that he had expected. It's one of those times when they kept giggling and laughing that Junmyeon found it almost impossible to draw.

Junmyeon's laugh remains such a beautiful melody. Puffing out a sigh, Chanyeol's in trouble.

_I want to be close to you again._

After some thought, Chanyeol heads back inside. He didn't go back to his office room but instead, he wears his coat and gloves as he is preparing to go out. It's still early for bedtime so if Chanyeol is quick, he might just catch Junmyeon before bed. He even brings a little wine bottle to gift it to Junmyeon.

He was contemplating whether to take the car or just walk there. In the end, he decides on the latter because Chanyeol doesn't feel like driving right now.

With an oil lamp in his hand, he steps out of the back gate and heads into the woods. Tonight is a full moon thus, it's not exactly pitch black. If this was years ago, it would light up the way even brighter because the trees weren’t as muddled as this.

Another reason why Chanyeol had decided to take the woods instead is due to his tiny little hope that he'll be able to meet the little rabbit again. He met the animal twice so it is not exactly impossible it will show up again.

To his dismay, however, throughout his walk, except for the snow, nothing else is white.

After 5 minutes since he left, finally, he sees the wooden roof of Junmyeon's house. Clasping on the wine bag tighter, he smiles when he spots Junmyeon standing on the small stairs at his porch. But, his steps halt from moving forward when he realizes what Junmyeon is wearing.

_What in God’s name?_

Junmyeon is in nothing but his hooded cloak. When Chanyeol says nothing, he really means _nothing_.

From the way he is sitting, the cloak covers the top part of Junmyeon's body but his legs are exposed to the cold without any clothing. Other than Junmyeon finding no problem in exposing himself naked at the front of his house, what's even more peculiar is that the blonde seems fine with the cold hitting his bare skin. Like the cold does not bother him one bit.

He'll get frostbite if he stays like that any longer!

But something about this whole scene is preventing Chanyeol from taking a step forward.

It feels like he has been standing there for a whole 2 minutes. Chanyeol is completely at loss on what to do. But before he could do anything, Junmyeon suddenly stands up.

"This form really lowers my tolerance for cold." Junmyeon complaints as he stretches himself. Chanyeol's eyes widen and he had to glance away for a moment after seeing Junmyeon's exposed torso. It feels like he's invading a huge privacy of Junmyeon's.

The blond walks forward, barefoot until he is a few steps away from his house.

_What are you thinking, Junmyeon?_

Just then, Chanyeol sees Junmyeon untying the knot holding his cloak together. With that, he lets the cloak fall onto the ground. Chanyeol inaudibly gasps at the motion. This time, however, Chanyeol didn't look away. He lets his eyes wander on Junmyeon's pale skin. And for someone who has been sitting out in the cold, no part of his body is red nor hurt. Eventually, Chanyeol's eyes fall onto the lines on Junmyeon's stomach.

Suddenly, Junmyeon starts kneeling down in fours raising more confusion on Chanyeol's behalf. He watches confusedly how Junmyeon sticks his body to the ground.

And then he sees it.

He sees the way there is white hair, just a few shades lighter than Junmyeon's skin start to grow out from his body. Two long ears that were never present suddenly perk up on top of Junmyeon's head as the man begin shrinking down. He kept resizing and all while, Chanyeol felt like he has lost his breathing. He watches in horror how the man he knew for years has _transformed_ into an animal.

Precisely a rabbit.

Chanyeol is in a state of shock that he doesn’t move a muscle at all. Not even when the rabbit or should he say, his friend has hopped away somewhere into the trees. When the white little animal is no longer in sight, Chanyeol's knees buckle and he falls onto the ground.

What just happened?!

Was he dreaming all the time?

Blinking his eyes repeatedly, Chanyeol tries to catch his breath. Did Junmyeon just... Did he just...

_Lord... what is this?!_

After letting his head cool down a little, Chanyeol is finally in his sense again. He stands up and runs towards Junmyeon's house.

"What... where..."

Chanyeol is in question as to what he should do. Scanning around, Junmyeon or the rabbit is nowhere to be found. Picking up the red cloak, Chanyeol gulps as hangs it on his arm. Everything is in disarray right now. Although Chanyeol feels a little fear in him, he decides to stay. It's not that he fears that Junmyeon would hurt him. No. It's just the fear of the unknown.

Sitting where Junmyeon sat previously, his butt does feel cold after a while. How did Junmyeon even withstand it? Then again, the shorter male did say that _"this form"_ lowers his tolerance of cold. Form as in... human form?

Is it a curse? That could explain why Junmyeon could do that... It's possible because Chanyeol knew Junmyeon as far as he can remember and he would've known if Junmyeon had this...power. If he were someone else, he would've found it hard to believe his eyes. Not like Chanyeol is not struggling but anyone would have been terrified.

Chanyeol however... is fearful at first but after pondering to himself, Chanyeol can't deny that something like this is possible.

He's a novelist. A writer. He wrote two books about mythical creatures before. Earlier, he wouldn't say that he believes all the research he had been doing on mythical creatures and their histories are true, but after seeing _that_ , it seems like there are more to the world than it meets the eye.

_What are you, Junmyeon?_

Chanyeol lost count on how long he had been outside. It's freezing. He couldn’t see it but he knows his lips are probably turning blue from the cold. Moving around seems to help him fight the cold but just barely.

It's an hour to 10. Meaning he's been out here for more than half an hour. Half of his conscience voices him to go home, get something warm and just meet Junmyeon tomorrow. It isn't as if Junmyeon is going anywhere. However, what's the point of going home if he can't sleep tonight?

_I'll just wait..._

Even if it kills him tonight, he'll just wait and meet—

Chanyeol's mind went blank when he finds a white rabbit just a few steps away from him. _Oh?_ When did it get here? Chanyeol couldn't mask his bewilderment because Junmyeon is finally here. It's Junmyeon, right? Who knows if there's any other rabbit. But Chanyeol's heart felt a familiar warmth upon looking closely at the white fluff. That easily solidify his assumption.

Crouching down, Chanyeol stretches his hands out. Now, that Junmyeon has shown himself here, he didn't want to scare the rabbit away. It's best if he... or it... comes to him.

As expected, he didn't exactly go to Chanyeol immediately. Changing his expression into a gentle one, Chanyeol tries again. "Come here, I have something for you." Only when he says that the rabbit starts to hop closer.

_So, he does understand me._

When Junmyeon nuzzles against his palm, Chanyeol's lips unconsciously tug upwards. _It's really you, isn't it..?_

"Junmyeon..." he mutters.

As soon as he said that, the rabbit thumps loudly on the ground in alarmed. It even caught Chanyeol off-guard. Chanyeol is no stranger to rabbit's behaviour, he knows what it meant. Before the rabbit could flee away, Chanyeol manages to pick it up despite the rabbit was milliseconds to slip away.

It's no surprise that the white rabbit in his hands is struggling with legs kicking in the air. After being out for so long, Chanyeol barely able to withstand the writhing. However, he fights the struggle and firmly presses it against him. "Don't fight, Junmyeon. I know."

The rabbit in his hands keeps squirming. Chanyeol had to shift his hands a little to hold Junmyeon better. "I'm not letting go of you! Can you talk?"

For a while, Junmyeon's thrashing starts to slow down. Even so, Chanyeol remains a secure grip just in case Junmyeon hops off from him. Breathing out a sigh, Chanyeol starts walking to the front door. He did not miss the way the rabbit flinched in his arms.

"Junmyeon, can you transform back? Or is it not possible?”

Another silence.

Can't he talk? Or at least a squeal?

"Even if you run away from me, it's futile because I know it's you. I saw you transformed." Chanyeol exhales. His hand is shivering slightly. "So that's why, please just talk to me."

There's a little sound coming from Junmyeon in his hands. It's uneasy, something close to a whimper. This could be Junmyeon’s response to him. "What is it?" Chanyeol asks, trying to look at the rabbit's face.

Just then, the weight in his arms is starting to increase as the rabbit transfigures. Chanyeol didn’t want to drop Junmyeon so he held it tightly despite its size growing bigger and bigger. It comes to a point that Chanyeol falls backwards, back hitting the wooden floor with the weight hovering above him.

Chanyeol groans from the impact on his back. His hand goes to rub the back of his head to soothe the pain. "Ouch..."

"I said..." At Junmyeon's voice, Chanyeol's previously closed eyes open and finds Junmyeon sitting just above his stomach. The man with the blond hair looks over his shoulder to stare down at Chanyeol. "...I'll talk to you."

In a split second, Junmyeon pushes himself off Chanyeol and stands up. The red cloak in Chanyeol's hand is being yanked away as Junmyeon puts the fabric around him. "You shouldn't be here." Junmyeon spats.

Chanyeol too hurriedly gets on his feet. "Why shouldn't I?"

Ignoring Chanyeol's question, Junmyeon glares at the taller. "How much did you see?"

Chanyeol sees the way Junmyeon is shaking right now. He's very positive it isn't from the cold. The man in front of him is _furious_. "Everything." He replies.

Horror flashes in Junmyeon's eyes. "No." He takes a step back as he holds his head. "No. No. This can't be!"

"Junmyeon, it's okay!" The taller tries to calm Junmyeon down.

"No, it's not!" Junmyeon yells, pushing Chanyeol's hand away. "You're not supposed to know! Nobody should know!" Junmyeon looks like he is so close to crying right now. "I'll be in danger..."

"In danger?! Why?"

"Why?" Junmyeon lets out a frustrated huff. His hands rest around his waist as his glare turns into worry. "Because our existence is peculiar."

 _Existence_.

So, it's not a curse. Therefore... Junmyeon is someone that can transform. A shapeshifter? For sure Chanyeol has heard of it. There are myths about it. Werewolves are the common one to many. Therefore, it would make sense if there are other animals that can transform into human or vice versa.

"Chanyeol!" Junmyeon kneels out of a sudden, surprising the taller. "I beg you. I will do anything you ask. Please don't tell a single soul about this!"

Seeing the blond male in front of him beg for mercy, Chanyeol's stomach twists in the wrong way. Junmyeon had gone as far as bowing until his head is almost touching the ground.

All of this… for Chanyeol's silence.

This isn't the sight he wants to see ever again. "Junmyeon, stand up."

The man on the ground didn't move a muscle. Chanyeol's heart breaks at the scene. Going on his knees as well despite the cold, Chanyeol repeats his words. "Junmyeon, I said stand up."

"Promise me, Chanyeol! Swear to me!" Junmyeon cries with his head still low.

The thing is, Junmyeon didn't have to go through all this to zip Chanyeol's mouth. The second Chanyeol hears that Junmyeon's life would be in danger, Chanyeol understands immediately how confidential this has to remain.

Chanyeol hears the sniffles coming from Junmyeon. Gently, Chanyeol's cold hands move to palm Junmyeon's face and lift it from the ground to make Junmyeon look at him. The only reason that Junmyeon's nose turns red was from his cry. Once again, Chanyeol's heart aches at the sight of Junmyeon. "Don't cry, Junmyeon. I won't, I promise." Chanyeol wipes the tears on the blond male’s cheek.

Junmyeon stares at him with tears brimming in his eyes. Shakily, the smaller takes Chanyeol's hands from his face and gives them a firm squeeze. "Swear to me."

Feeling the tremor in his hands, Chanyeol brings Junmyeon's knuckles to his lips. The action causes Junmyeon to widen his eyes but Chanyeol maintains their eye contact as he lingers a kiss on Junmyeon's hands. "I swear, Junmyeon. I won't tell a single soul."

Chanyeol releases Junmyeon's hand to fix Junmyeon's cloak. Sensing that his chest and torso are exposed, Junmyeon lets go of the taller’s hand to cover himself up. The blond remains silent as he refuses to make eye contact with Chanyeol. He is still visibly shaken. Chanyeol doesn’t blame him. How can he not when his long-time secret has been revealed? Chanyeol wonders how Junmyeon had successfully kept this secret away from him all this time. It doesn't make any sense how Chanyeol, someone who was always by Junmyeon's side did not figure this out.

Considering how hard he's kept this secret all this time, this must have been a fright to Junmyeon. "Junmyeon." Chanyeol calls him softly. Chanyeol sits up at the same time he pulls Junmyeon up by his elbows too. "Do you want me to give you some space?"

"What...?"

Chanyeol exhales. "This might be too much for you right now. I'm willing to discuss this matter tomorrow. Only if you promise to not run away from me."

Junmyeon seems surprised that Chanyeol is willing to delay the confrontation. The blond probably expects Chanyeol to bombard him with multiple questions to which Chanyeol desperately wants to. However, Chanyeol decides the opposite.

The latter's answer comes slightly later with a nod. "Thank you..." he mutters, voice barely a whisper. As Junmyeon blinks, another tear rolls down on his pink cheeks.

When they were young, Junmyeon doesn't cry often. He was the type of person to hold his emotions back. But when the rare moment occurs, Chanyeol made sure that he will caress Junmyeon's head until his sobs died down. And when the shorter has completely cooled down, Chanyeol would plant a kiss on his forehead and told Junmyeon that everything will be okay.

 _That_ sense of familiarity is coming back to him. Seeing Junmyeon cry in front of him, it reminds Chanyeol of why he would always make sure whoever made Junmyeon cry would pay the price.

With a tug of Junmyeon's nape, Chanyeol leans forward to give Junmyeon a kiss on his forehead. Their relationship has always been questionably affectionate especially in front of people's eyes. But Chanyeol doesn't mind it one bit. After 11 years, nothing will change that.

Junmyeon finds himself stunned at the action. He didn't pull away and Chanyeol is grateful that he didn't. "I'll see you tomorrow." Chanyeol says one last time before he stands up.

His knees are in pain after sitting in the cold but that's nothing as compared to seeing Junmyeon's teary face. With one last assuring smile, Chanyeol walks away from the still kneeling Junmyeon, not forgetting to take his oil lamp together with him.

Chanyeol hardly sleeps yesterday. He was worried, yes. Terrified, not at all. His main concern is that if he goes over to Junmyeon's place, the man wouldn't be there anymore. He had just got his best friend back after 11 years, there is no way that Chanyeol would bear losing him again.

Even during breakfast, Chanyeol barely has any appetite to eat. All he wants to do is sprint over to Junmyeon's house as of now. It's 8 am... Junmyeon should've been awake by now but Chanyeol doesn't want to rush Junmyeon. That will surely intimidate him.

In the end, Chanyeol settles for 9 am when he walks towards his garage. He decides to not take the car again considering how the snow had piled a lot overnight as compared to yesterday. He already had a hard time walking through the snow yesterday but it seems like if he takes the car, it wouldn't be a surprise if his car got stuck along the way.

Again, he makes his way through the back gate and into the woods. Chanyeol had forgotten how beautiful it is to walk through this pathway during winter. As he mentioned before, the pathway in the woods after 11 years has become narrower. He just hopes it doesn't close this pathway.

When Chanyeol sees the familiar house, just like yesterday, he walks up to the empty porch. It seems like Junmyeon had been clearing the snow judging from the shovel and the clear path.

"Chanyeol!"

The tall man hears someone shouts his name.

Instead of at the house, Chanyeol follows the voice and sees Junmyeon sitting on a tree nearby. It's a pretty short tree but thick and sturdy. Junmyeon is sitting on it with his feet dangling in the air proves it. With quicken steps, Chanyeol makes his way to Junmyeon.

Once nearby, Chanyeol lets out a chuckle as he cranes his neck a little to meet Junmyeon's eyes. "I see you still love sitting on that tree." It was the tree that Junmyeon and him loved climbing. Well, the only tree they are able and allowed to since it's just short.

Not for Chanyeol, of course. He especially loved climbing the other tree that's close to Junmyeon's bedroom window. This one's a piece of cake.

He didn't expect Junmyeon to still have that habit of his.

"I haven't in a while. But I got curious."

How funny it is to see a grown man sitting on a tree branch with that reason. Only Junmyeon. Then again, Chanyeol too got curious whether the tree would hold them both like it used to. "Scoot over." Chanyeol instructs him.

"Ehh?" Junmyeon looks at him in surprise.

"Scoot over so I can sit as well."

"You're coming up here?"

Chanyeol laughs as he already has one foot on the tree. "What do you think?"

Junmyeon watches in uncertainty. _Can he do it?_ Chanyeol has been a city man for more than a decade so for him to suddenly climb a tree with that outfit is a little…

The man ended up by Junmyeon’s side with ease. He's been doing for years prior to his departure after all. Now that both of them are on the branch, Junmyeon worries a little. Junmyeon might have weighed the same if not less than when he was younger, but Chanyeol grew inches taller.

But Chanyeol doesn't worry much. It's a sturdy tree after all. It didn't even shake when Chanyeol was stepping on the branch and sitting right beside Junmyeon. Although, Chanyeol did almost slipped and that made Junmyeon nearly scream.

"Be careful, Chanyeol!" Junmyeon scolds him.

It's the branch! It's a little slippery and wet with the snow. Even so, Chanyeol successfully sits beside Junmyeon. Seeing how both of them are facing Junmyeon's house, it really does bring back memories.

Chanyeol hopes this sense of nostalgia would bring a sense of comfort to Junmyeon. A sense of home when he's with Chanyeol. He can see that Junmyeon is still nervous around him. There's a wall between them although they've been spending more time with each other these days. Chanyeol wanted to show Junmyeon that he's still the same 15-year-old boy that cares a lot about him.

Chanyeol gives the gentlest encouraging smile to Junmyeon. "Whenever you're ready."

Junmyeon’s jaw clenched as he brings his palm that was holding the branch to his lap. Chanyeol wonders if he's cold without the gloves. "What do you want to know?" Junmyeon asks him instead.

If it were up to Chanyeol, there's a _long_ list of questions he would like to ask. For starters, he'll ask the most basic one. "What are you?"

Their gazes locked together before Junmyeon evidently gulps. "A human. Also a rabbit at the same time.” He answers. "Shapeshifter. At least that's what people has been calling us."

There's an _‘us’_? So Junmyeon isn't the only one with this ability. "Are your parents...?"

"The same? Yeah. It's a... it's a descendant thing, you could say that. My parents have them. My late grandparents too. It runs in the blood." Junmyeon explains.

Chanyeol has never seen Junmyeon's grandparents but he's surprised to learn that there's a whole bloodline of shapeshifters. Then, it means that there are more people out there that can transfigure!

The Kims.... someone so close with Chanyeol, how come Chanyeol has zero ideas about this?

"Have you ever transformed while I was... still here?"

Junmyeon nods to Chanyeol's surprise. He has?! All this time?!!

"At night most of the time. Usually within the house. We are more dominant as human."

Chanyeol has never seen Junmyeon with a rabbit before. He had only known Junmyeon favours them a lot. Now it's clear to him why.

"I meant what I said yesterday, Chanyeol." Junmyeon's tone changes into a serious one, almost threatening. "No one can know."

"I won't tell." That's a given, Chanyeol thinks. Thinking back, Junmyeon said that he'd be in danger if words got out. Of course, he would. The town already hates him enough. If they knew about this, Chanyeol can imagine Junmyeon being accused of sorcery or most highly be deemed a curse. It's a death sentence. "I promise. But you have to promise me one thing too."

Junmyeon turns to face Chanyeol with determination in his eyes. "Anything!"

Chanyeol lets out a small laugh. It's not that serious but he understands why Junmyeon is like this. "Later, I hope there would be no more secrets between us." When he sees the change in Junmyeon's face, Chanyeol instantly adds. "I mean, not about your past. You don’t have to tell me that. That's why I said ‘later’."

"Oh..." Junmyeon bites his lips.

Chanyeol really hopes Junmyeon would say yes. Sure, Chanyeol does have a lot of questions about Junmyeon's past. However, if Junmyeon chooses not to talk about it, then Chanyeol is more than happy to respect it.

He had been thinking.

Chanyeol doesn't want to be held up in the past. If he really thinks about getting close to Junmyeon just like they used to, he needs Junmyeon to be comfortable with him. Eliminating secrets between them would help make them closer. He has said this before, Chanyeol wants to be there for Junmyeon. He desperately wants the latter to know that.

"I..." Junmyeon exhales then glimpses at Chanyeol with a soft smile. "I can do that."

And with just that, it's enough for Chanyeol to show Junmyeon his wide smile. "Great! I appreciate that, Junmyeon."

"Chanyeol. You... don't think of me differently?" The blond asks.

"Why would I?"

"You know," Junmyeon shrugs, frowning a little. "I'm a monster..."

Chanyeol really wanted to laugh. He can't hold it in as he bursts out laughing. "You call that cute fluffy white fur a monster?"

"Hey, don't insult my form!" Junmyeon huffs as he gently punches Chanyeol's shoulder. "Plus, you just might… considering I'm very odd."

After laughing, it feels all so natural that Chanyeol's hand finds Junmyeon's. He pulls Junmyeon's hand to his lap and gives it a little squeeze. "I think that part of you is adorable."

Junmyeon's eyes light up. "Really?"

Chanyeol nods, his cloth thumb caressing Junmyeon's hand. "Really."

Even minutes later when they have moved on to a new topic, their hands stayed on the same position and Junmyeon didn't seem like he minded.

Yeah. Chanyeol definitely misses this feeling.

It's good to have his friend back.

"Uh... orange?"

Junmyeon grumbles as Chanyeol guessed another wrong answer to his question. "Nope. Not even close."

"Uh... black?"

Again, Junmyeon shakes his head as his right hand is busy sketching on the paper. This time, Junmyeon draws on his black sketchbook. Meanwhile, Chanyeol is wrecking his brain trying to recall what Junmyeon's favourite colour is.

"It's red—no, blue! Blue! It's blue, isn't it?!" Chanyeol tries again, a little more confident than before.

Junmyeon only hums as he lifts his gaze from his drawing for a second to jokingly glare at Chanyeol before going back to it. "I don't blame you if you forget."

Junmyeon didn't mind but Chanyeol does! Not when Junmyeon had said that his favourite colour didn't change from when he was younger. Therefore, Chanyeol should have known this! "It's green...?”

"Your previous answer was closer." Junmyeon rolls his eyes.

Currently, both of them are sitting in Junmyeon's living room. It's much more spacious now that Junmyeon has cleaned it up as compared to when he came last week while Junmyeon had been working. It's a pity. If it was summer or spring, that would be nice to bring Junmyeon out for a leisure time outside.

For now, they can only settle here next to the fireplace in this nostalgic house. "The drawing is almost done. Do you give up?"

"Already?!" Chanyeol says, sitting up from his lying down position. "Is it almost 10 minutes?"

Standing up, Junmyeon concentrates on adding the final touches of his drawing as he approaches Chanyeol. "I have to say it's not perfect considering you gave me a limitation of time." Junmyeon warns him.

Knowing Junmyeon, anything that he draws will be beautiful. That's why he was the teacher's pet for his good talent. Many people were jealous of him even when he was a kid but not Chanyeol. The more Junmyeon glowed, the happier Chanyeol was.

With a nervous chuckle, Junmyeon turns the drawing that was facing his chest and presents it to Chanyeol. As expected, Junmyeon's hands do no flaw. Even under 10 minutes, Junmyeon manages to capture Chanyeol's body posture wonderfully. Even the small detail such as Chanyeol's wristwatch was drawn quite precisely.

"I don't think I will get tired of saying this, but you really are very talented." Chanyeol mutters in awe.

The compliment sends a smile on Junmyeon's face. It's been so long since Junmyeon felt joy and excitement as he draws. It really has been so long. Thus, he appreciates this little opportunity where he can draw for someone else. "You can keep it. It will be my gift to you."

Chanyeol's eyes gleam in gratitude. He would love that so much. In fact, he will drive over to the town to buy a frame for this drawing. "I'll hang it on the wall."

"You don't have to!" Junmyeon replies. The temperature keeps dropping so Junmyeon adds more firewood to the fire. "It's violet." Chanyeol finally looks at him from staring at Junmyeon's gift. "My favourite colour is violet. I know yours was black."

That's a surprise. He didn't think Junmyeon would remember much from their days back then. His favourite colour might have changed now, but it was black before he left. "I'm touched that you remembered."

"Should I feel insulted that you don't?" Junmyeon jokes while poking the wood with the iron. Taking a peek at the long limbs on his sofa, Junmyeon knew his question would make Chanyeol pout.

"I will remember everything from now on." Chanyeol pledges seriously.

Junmyeon laughs. That is very much like Chanyeol to take everything seriously. Not one human in this world can remember everything perfectly. Even so, Junmyeon just nods in compliance. "Sure, if you’d like." _Oh, right!_ Junmyeon waddles to one of the cabinets. He pulls the drawer where he kept his sewing kit and takes out a needle and a thread. "There's a slight tear on your left shoulder."

"Hmm?" Chanyeol couldn't quite understand him.

"Your sweater." Junmyeon points to show the area on his own body. "I can help you stitch it up."

"Oho~ Are you boasting how multitalented you are?"

The blond man lets out a snort as he slaps Chanyeol's thigh, beckoning him to scoot further in to make room for Junmyeon to sit. "No. It's just distracting."

"Awww. That is very adorable." Chanyeol coos.

"How is that adorable?" Junmyeon gawks in disbelief. The taller's habit of showering him with flattering words never seem to cease. "That aside, give me your sweater."

"This? But I am not wear anything underneath it." Chanyeol cocks his head to the side. He's not one to wear many layers knowing that he won't be going outdoor in a long time. So he abandons his shirt inside and just wears one layer of a super thick sweater and his coat.

"There isn’t?"

"Yeap. But if you still need it..." Chanyeol lifts his shirt, exposing his stomach to which Junmyeon screeches.

"No! No, it's fine!" Junmyeon pulls down Chanyeol's hands to let the sweater covers his body again. "I'll just do it from here."

Somehow, Junmyeon's reaction brings an unknown pleasure to Chanyeol. Especially when he sees how Junmyeon tried very hard to not look at his body just now. "Alright, then." Chanyeol says as he leans back down the sofa.

As Junmyeon silently works on the tear on his shoulder, Chanyeol can't take his eyes off Junmyeon. He's pretty. He has always been. Back then, Junmyeon doesn't have such prominent dips under his eyes but even with that, the man still looks beautiful.

"I'm curious, Chanyeol." Junmyeon states out of the blue. "Will you stay here for a long time?"

Chanyeol grins. "Why? Will you miss me?"

Junmyeon too mirrors Chanyeol's grin as he pulls the needle upwards. "I haven't had a company like you in a long time. Of course, I would when the time comes."

It won't be just Junmyeon. Chanyeol too is already lamenting the day he has to go back to his apartment even though it's not anytime soon. "I plan to make the best memories out of the months of my stay."

"You're able to live here without working for a few months?"

"I made a fortune with my last book." Chanyeol confesses. While Junmyeon is concentrating, Chanyeol notices that the shorter man's hair keeps blocking his path of vision. Gently, Chanyeol tugs Junmyeon's fringe behind his ear. "I planned to write something beautiful while I'm here."

Just like how Chanyeol believes in him, Junmyeon too believes that Chanyeol’s skills are impeccable. From the short stories that Chanyeol would read to him, Junmyeon knows that he would succeed in writing another masterpiece.

"I do wish to read your books someday." Junmyeon says earnestly. He makes a knot to secure the end before reaching out for the scissors to cut it.

"I have all the copies at my house. Visit my house later." Chanyeol offers.

"I will." Junmyeon pats Chanyeol's shoulder once he is done with his work.

Surprisingly, Chanyeol takes Junmyeon's hand and loosely interlaces their fingers. He sees some scars on Junmyeon's fingers, probably due to him working so hard. And yet, Junmyeon's fingers are still so slender and is a contrast to Chanyeol's giant ones. The corner of Chanyeol's lips tugs upwards as he sees how well their hands fit together. "You're very warm." Chanyeol sighs contentedly.

"And you are still affectionate." The blond laughs at how Chanyeol tucks their joint hands under his chin.

"Only with you, Junmyeon." When Chanyeol says that, he gazes directly into Junmyeon's brown orbs. He thinks it's very easy to get lost in Junmyeon's eyes. They're beautiful, innocent and lovely. Those are everything Junmyeon are.

His heart keeps getting excited whenever Junmyeon is near him. And he _wants_ Junmyeon to be closer even when there is no space between them.

Just like when he was 15, Chanyeol longs to touch Junmyeon.

_"Junmyeon?"_

Both of them hears a woman's voice accompanied by a knock. It sounded like Taeyeon. Then again, who else could it be? "That must be, Taeyeon. I'll open the door." Junmyeon lets go of their hands and stands up to exit the living room. Almost immediately, Chanyeol misses the warmth in his hand.

A minute later, Taeyeon appears and she seems surprised to see Chanyeol lying in the living room. "Oh, you're here."

Chanyeol sits up then fixes his sweater. "It's where I am most of the time now." Chanyeol gleefully chirps. It definitely is. The revelation of Junmyeon's secret was a catalyst to their closeness. Since then, Junmyeon tells him more piece about his past. Just some little things like how Junmyeon would ride his bike to the town despite a super-hot day just to get a jar of cookie.

Instantly the next day, Chanyeol brought 3 jars of those for Junmyeon.

It was worth it to see Junmyeon's giggles as he tries to hug all of his chocolates.

"The tea got cold. I'll be right back." Junmyeon excuses himself to the kitchen with the tray in his hands.

"I see that you two are back to being close friends." Taeyeon gives him a thumbs up.

"Perhaps." Chanyeol replies a little too happily.

Even Taeyeon is trying to mask her smile. "Oh, look at you. On cloud nine. Are you two... _together_?"

Chanyeol knows what Taeyeon means. Together as in... lovers. Chanyeol for one is not delusional. Even when they're always together with affectionate touches… but they are not lovers. It doesn't mean that Chanyeol doesn't want to be. He very much... would love to embrace Junmyeon. _All_ of Junmyeon. "We're not." The expression on Chanyeol's face dims a little.

The woman crosses her legs as she leans back. "I see. But you want to."

She's not wrong. In fact, Taeyeon probably would have caught that up ever since Chanyeol talked to her about Junmyeon. "Only if Junmyeon feels the same way as well."

Taeyeon hums, drumming her fingers on her thighs. "Does he?"

That's actually something that Chanyeol would like to know as well. They have always been good friends. Too good that people had mistaken them multiple times for being lovers.

Despite how Junmyeon was always in Chanyeol's arms, they're at most, just two close friends. They had never talked about their romantic feelings together. There wasn't a need to because everybody understood that Junmyeon was for him and he was for Junmyeon. Nobody would even think of sandwiching between them because that would be pointless.

They were young.

And now... Chanyeol thinks that he’s being greedy. He wants more of Junmyeon. It's insane how Chanyeol's heart remains the same for 11 years.

"I hope so." Chanyeol exasperates.

"This view!" Junmyeon shouts as his arms are wide open. Chanyeol chortles seeing Junmyeon's excitement merely by seeing the scenery from his balcony. "Remember how we used to have a picnic down there." Junmyeon points down to the spot by the lake.

"Indeed. And I also remembered how you almost drown there."

Junmyeon shoots a glare at the taller. "And whose fault was that?"

"Okay. Okay. It was mine." Chanyeol surrenders as he squishes Junmyeon's cheeks and turns Junmyeon's head to face the front again. "Go back to admiring the dusk."

The sun is setting which leaves the sky gradient in colours. There's a reason why this is Chanyeol's favourite spot in this house. The sky here decorated with sparkles of stars is something unattainable in the city. Not as clear as the ones in his hometown.

"I wish I could paint this view right now." Junmyeon hums as he gazes adoringly at the front. His hand made a little movement as if he is painting a canvas.

Chanyeol makes a mental note to prepare art supplies here at his balcony for Junmyeon's next visit. As a contrast to Junmyeon, Chanyeol keeps shivering from the cold. Remembering Junmyeon’s words the other day, Chanyeol wishes he has better tolerance of cold too. He would have been able to sit out in the cold longer than he can currently.

Apparently, Junmyeon notices. "Should we get inside? It's very cold, isn’t it?"

"No, it's fine!" Chanyeol replies instead. Junmyeon hadn't seen the lake from this angle in ages so Chanyeol wants Junmyeon to have his time admiring the beauty a little longer. "It's not that cold." He lies unconvincingly.

Junmyeon stares at the taller in disbelief. "You are a terrible liar."

"That, I am." Chanyeol too agrees. Even so, he still refuses to go back inside for Junmyeon.

The blond male stretches his hand out to gather some snowflakes in his hand. If he had wanted more, Junmyeon could have gotten them from above his head, Chanyeol jokes. Pointing to the shorter man’s head, Chanyeol doubles in laughter when Junmyeon kept brushing off his hair even when there’s nothing on it.

“You and your tendency to tease me really cannot be separated.” Junmyeon whines, stepping away from Chanyeol to create a gap between them.

 _Aww_ , he’s sulking. Chanyeol laughs again as Junmyeon tries to pretend like Chanyeol isn’t there.

Maybe it was the cold. Maybe it was the view. Or maybe...

It was Junmyeon who looked breath-taking in front of an equally breath-taking view, that Chanyeol finds himself hugging the shorter from behind. Chanyeol wraps his arms around Junmyeon's shoulder and lets it hang in front of his chest. The man in his arms is obviously startled as he flinches. "What are you doing?" Junmyeon asks, trying to crane his neck upwards.

"You're right. It's freezing. So let's just stay like this." Chanyeol says as he rests his chin on Junmyeon's head. He has always known that Junmyeon has a small frame but after hugging him, he is _really_ small.

"You're being too familiar with me." Although Junmyeon says that but he doesn't shake Chanyeol's hands off. Instead, the man leans back a little, drawing a tiny smile on Chanyeol's lips.

"We've always been like this." Chanyeol replies, tightening his hold around Junmyeon. The fabric of Junmyeon's cloak tickles his wrist. Right here, right now, Chanyeol does feel warm. In the outside and in the inside.

"For some reason... it feels like time didn't change anything." Junmyeon mutters as he turns around to face Chanyeol. "Is it weird to think like that?"

The hand that was on Junmyeon's shoulders moves down until it relaxes above Junmyeon's spine. Chanyeol wanted to tell Junmyeon that he feels the same way. However, Chanyeol knows even without his words, Junmyeon can still tell. The expression on Chanyeol’s face is enough to showcase his sincerity.

He wishes the time would stay still so that he can savour this moment. Capture it then engrave it in his heart. It’s the reason coming back to his hometown feels like it is Chanyeol’s best decision that he has ever made in a while.

However, there’s only so much cold that Chanyeol can handle. "Come on." The taller man entangles himself from Junmyeon. "Our dinner will get cold."

Junmyeon nods as he lets himself being pulled by the hand. Their pinkies cross together as they head back inside.

"Sir."

On Chanyeol's left, Minji is already prepared to take Chanyeol's coat and gloves.

"Oh, Minji. Everything is well-prepared?" Chanyeol asks after handing her his coat.

"Uh? Yeah..." Minji's voice contains a little caution. Instead of looking at Chanyeol, Minji narrows her eyes at the man beside him.

Glancing at Junmyeon, the man keeps his head low. Surely Junmyeon is not ignorant of the glare directed to him. "Ehem." Chanyeol clears his throat. His action successfully cuts the tension between his maid and Junmyeon. "Junmyeon, your cloak?"

Junmyeon shakes his head without reluctance. "Oh... it's fine. I'm wearing it."

 _Strange_ , Chanyeol thought to himself. Junmyeon can't be cold.

Ah... It could be that Junmyeon didn’t want anyone touching his stuff. Furthermore, Minji sending Junmyeon a stinky eye is enough to make the blond stay on guard. It looks like Chanyeol needs to have a word with her later.

"Let's go." Chanyeol guides Junmyeon to the dining table.

Dinner was great. Chanyeol learned another new thing about the present Junmyeon. He was told that Taeyeon brought more clothes today! More clothes mean more income, the blond chirps happily. It's great to hear that. Though, Chanyeol wished Junmyeon a different career path than working in silent. Through this too Chanyeol found out that Junmyeon didn't finish his school.

It was quite unfortunate. Junmyeon was smarter than he was. Then again, even if Junmyeon did, would anyone hire him? That thought itself infuriates Chanyeol. How can the whole town desert a young adult like that?

Seeing Junmyeon being contented with the bare minimum, it made Chanyeol realize how privilege he is.

"Wasn't this your father's office?" Junmyeon gapes as he enters what now has become a place for Chanyeol to work.

"It was. I made some changes." His father's office had dark walls. Barely any furniture because his father practices minimalism in his space for work. However, Chanyeol's different. He decorated the dim walls with portraits of vibrant colours. It somehow help him in generating ideas.

"Oh, here's mine!" Junmyeon runs excitedly to the corner left as he stands in front of a framed art. Indeed, that was the one that Junmyeon drew for him by the fireplace.

Chanyeol tags behind Junmyeon until he is right next to the man. "Didn't I say I was going to frame it?"

Junmyeon is at awe as he stares at his own artwork. "You really know how to make me smile." The shorter says with his eyes turning into crescent moons as he smiles. It is one of those smiles that made Chanyeol heart instantly skips a beat.

 _I'm glad_ , Chanyeol wanted to say.

"You're still wearing your cloak?" He's been curious about this. Junmyeon knows how to sew. So, if he wanted a coat, he could have made one. Instead, he wears this blue one all the time.

"Oh, this?" Junmyeon unties the string. "I guess I can cast it aside now."

Chanyeol hums. "Maybe I should buy you a coat as a gift." It was only meant for Chanyeol himself to hear his own thoughts. However, Chanyeol being the brilliant man he is, unconsciously blurted it out loud.

"It's not that I don't want to." Junmyeon folds the fabric then places it neatly on the table. "But at any time, I have to wear this."

 _Have_?

"Does it have anything to do with the fact that you're..."

Junmyeon nods. "We have rather a distinctive smell. To protect ourselves from being discovered, we wear this cloak. It's quite special."

Such things exists?! Chanyeol can't hide the fascination in his eyes. "Really?! Can I touch it?"

The expression Junmyeon gave him was a little cautious but he eventually nods. Carefully, Chanyeol reaches out to touch the soft fabric. It feels just like any other polyester fabric.

"My mother said there's an important element in there that conceal our smell. I didn't know what it was. She didn’t get to tell me." His tone slowly saddens as he speaks. "I only started wearing it after my parents pass away."

No wonder Chanyeol had never seen Junmyeon wore this. Despite the colour going well with Junmyeon's pale skin tone, it seems tiring to wear such heavy cloth all the time.

Still... an extraordinary cloak with special abilities? To witness and touch such wonder in this world, Chanyeol must have saved a nation in his previous world. It got him _very_ curious about the fabric. There are so many questions he came up with regarding this item that he had paid no attention before.

Is the element can be found beneath the ground?

Has it be known to science or was it an unclassified element?

Above all, this is such an exciting discovery! Chanyeol can't believe he's able to live in a universe where mythical creatures do exist.

"Uh... Chanyeol." Junmyeon gulps as he calls the taller. Chanyeol has this thrilled expression on his face that does not sit well with Junmyeon. He's... terrified to see how interested Chanyeol is. "Show me your books!" The blond tries to divert the topic.

"Oh, the books!" Chanyeol finally leaves the poor cloth alone then hops to the shelves. "Here they are." Chanyeol presents to them like how an archaeologist would present their discovery. "This is the second book. And then, the first." Chanyeol hands the two books to Junmyeon.

"The book cover is really pretty." Junmyeon compliments him. Of course, it is beautifully drawn. Chanyeol remembers being a little picky about choosing the covers. It needed to have a huge impact on anyone who passes by. _"The tale of Hippogriff."_ Junmyeon reads out loud. "What's that?"

"A Hippogriff. A creature with the front half of an eagle and the hind half of a horse. But the whole book is about three young kids who discovered it in the woods."

"Oh..." Junmyeon has an unreadable expression which is a little confusing to Chanyeol. “And the Golden Tale?"

"This one is interesting." Chanyeol points out. "It's about a girl who met a Merman. There are plenty fictions about mermen and mermaids but I thought I would give it a try as well."

"You… write about mythical creatures." Junmyeon comes to a conclusion as he scans the two books.

Chanyeol nods. "I have always like to write about them. I did a lot of research too. It wasn't easy." Chanyeol explains as he sits down in his leather chair. "I even had to meet some experts to learn more about them. It wasn't an easy process... But I did make quite a few close friends along the way."

Junmyeon turns silent. His previous enthusiasm is absent as Chanyeol explains further. Because Chanyeol was passionately explaining his journey with the book, he didn't at all notice how Junmyeon's jaw clenched.

"That's interesting..." Junmyeon utters out. He tries his best to put up a smile. Without further words, Junmyeon puts the books on top of his folded cloak. Seeing the books again, his stomach churns uncomfortably.

"Junmyeon?" Chanyeol is no longer in his chair but he's right behind Junmyeon. "Are you okay?"

Junmyeon's face is a little pale more than it already is. Despite that, Junmyeon nods and puts up a demeanour. "I'm fine. I think I ate too much."

"I see." Chanyeol nods. He takes steps closer to Junmyeon although there's barely any space left between them. Junmyeon's eyes widen as he is forced to crane his neck upwards to meet Chanyeol's gaze. "Have you ever thought of cutting your hair?" Chanyeol lightly brushes Junmyeon's fringe.

The blond male feels a little hot throughout his cheeks at the gesture. He should've gotten used to this since it's not exactly new. But even back then, Junmyeon's heart wasn't exactly unmoved whenever the 15-year-old Park Chanyeol would cling around him. "I already did a month ago. Is it messy?"

Chanyeol shakes his head. "You look pretty either way."

"Oh, Chanyeol." Junmyeon jokingly punches the taller man's stomach. "Don't say such absurd things."

Chanyeol pouts. "I am telling the truth?"

"You are the only person that would think that. I did not age well like you did." Junmyeon says truthfully. It's not like Junmyeon didn't realize how dull his complexion is. Not to mention how Junmyeon's dark circles made him appear a decade older.

Chanyeol on the other hand, begs to differ. It's illogical how Junmyeon doesn't see how beautiful he is. Then again, Junmyeon never really took any Chanyeol's compliment to him seriously. "You _are_ beautiful." Chanyeol mutters with the sincerest tone. The brunet’s hands that were just by his sides are suddenly cradling Junmyeon's cheeks. There's no hint of a smile on Chanyeol's face because he wants Junmyeon to know how serious he is.

Having trouble to reciprocate Chanyeol’s intense gaze, Junmyeon clears his throat. "I... appreciate it." Junmyeon moves away from Chanyeol. If he didn't, things would be much dangerous than it already is. "I think I should go home."

"Huh?" Chanyeol watches how Junmyeon unfolds his cloak and ties it around him. Junmyeon pauses a little as he stares at Chanyeol's books before he picks them up.

"You can stay the night." Chanyeol offers.

"Oh, I have to decline. Uh... Taeyeon might stop by."

Taeyeon again? Chanyeol has been hearing a lot about Taeyeon from Junmyeon lately. Although, all of them are just about work but... Chanyeol is a little...suspicious. "You two aren't together, right?" _They wouldn’t_ , Chanyeol reasons out. Taeyeon knew the history of him and Junmyeon, thus, she would have been honest if there's something going on.

"This again? Why do you keep thinking so?”

Chanyeol was about to answer but foreseeing how possessive he would come off to Junmyeon, he backtracks. "I don't know..." Chanyeol mutters glumly.

Junmyeon glances at him weirdly before he speaks again. "Do you perhaps... like Taeyeon?"

If Chanyeol was drinking, he would've fallen into a choking mess. Hearing that, Chanyeol felt as if he had been insulted. "What?!"

"You've been acting strange whenever she's mentioned. If you do, you can just say so." Junmyeon gives him a pat on his shoulder. "You probably has more chance than I—"

Before Junmyeon could even finish his sentence, Chanyeol had cornered him against the nearest wall. On the taller man’s face, he bears no smile. Just a glance at his face, Junmyeon knew that he must have said the wrong thing. But he’s not exactly sure why Chanyeol seems angry.

"After all this time, you think Taeyeon is the one that I like."

Junmyeon's Adam’s apple bops as he sees the visible lines in between Chanyeol's brows. "Wh... Why are you angry?"

Chanyeol didn't answer. He merely stares at Junmyeon until a few seconds have passed. Emitting a loud sigh, Chanyeol removes his palm from the wall. "I am not. Maybe just a tad bit but that’s not the point. Look, Junmyeon. I don't like Taeyeon. There's someone else that I like." Chanyeol confesses as he moves a little closer.

Seeing how Junmyeon chooses not to respond, Chanyeol asks. "Are you not going to ask me who?" The books on Junmyeon's hand are being removed and placed on the ground. Chanyeol comes back up and his face is more determined than ever. "Then again, you must have known how I feel about you."

 _This is it_. Their years of friendship are on the line but Chanyeol wants to do this. They're not kids anymore to beat around the bush. Chanyeol _wants_ to take another step further. And they wouldn't go anywhere if neither starts anything. "Junmyeon—"

"No." The shorter male shakes his head. He wanted to move backwards but his back has already hit the wall. "Chanyeol, stop."

The quick refusal surprises Chanyeol. The other didn't even listen to what Chanyeol has to say. "Why?"

"You can’t like me." Junmyeon stammers, his pupils shaking. "No, I won't. I can't do that to you." Junmyeon tries to push Chanyeol away with his palm.

However, Junmyeon's soft push doesn't even budge Chanyeol. Instead, Chanyeol tugs Junmyeon's hand that was on his chest and brings it to his lips. "You say that Junmyeon but... I know that you feel the same way as I do." Chanyeol gives another peck on the blond man’s wrist before he lifts his eyes to meet Junmyeon's brown ones. "Our friendship was never normal. It hasn't been since middle school. You know I _love_ you and you do too."

 _Love_ , Junmyeon gulps.

"We were young then, Chanyeol. Things have changed." Junmyeon tries.

"Not for me," He lets go of Junmyeon's hand. Taking Junmyeon by surprise, Chanyeol snakes his arms around Junmyeon and tugs him forward. Their bodies are being pressed together.

"Chanyeol—"

"I've always wanted you, Junmyeon. 11 years didn’t change that because I _still_ do." Chanyeol whispers those words just above Junmyeon's lips. Their noses brush together thanks to the close proximity of their faces. Chanyeol wants to kiss Junmyeon so bad. However, their first kiss should be where Junmyeon wanted it too and not one-sided. "Do you really have no feelings for me at all?"

Junmyeon didn't answer. But, Chanyeol can see that his silence wasn’t a rejection. If it was, Junmyeon lips wouldn’t have leaned forward slightly and then pulls back as if he can't decide whether to kiss Chanyeol or not. It made Chanyeol realize that some part of Junmyeon wants him too. "Your call, Junmyeon. Even if you deny it, I already know how you feel."

There was still hesitancy after he said that but not for long. It only takes Chanyeol's encouraging nudge on the nose before Junmyeon moves forward and their lips meet with a kiss. It was just a pressed of lips at first. A very tender but long one. Chanyeol pulls back slightly to see if Junmyeon has any second thoughts. However, Junmyeon's gaze on him... Chanyeol can perceive what pooling in his eyes.

 _Desire_.

All thoughts aside, Chanyeol's palm is instantly on Junmyeon's nape and pulls him in for the 2nd kiss.

He opens his mouth slightly so he can fit their lips better. Tilting his head to the side, Chanyeol opts to make their kiss deeper and by that, he means he wants to taste every inch of the shorter male's lips. Chanyeol knew that after those years of yearning, kissing Junmyeon would be a bliss. But he didn't think it would drive him senseless like now. Every time their lips disconnects, Chanyeol chases Junmyeon's lips again and capture it between his. His hand starts moving downwards from Junmyeon's nape until it stops just above Junmyeon's spine. As if their bodies aren't already gapless, Chanyeol thinks the space between them is still not enough as he pulls Junmyeon's waist closer.

"Chanyeol—" Junmyeon breaks the kiss to take a deep breath. He is panting rather heavily but Chanyeol couldn't stop. His fingers go to untie the cloak and it instantly falls down to the ground. Now that there's nothing in the way, Chanyeol dips his head under Junmyeon's jaw to give the spot a little attention. Automatically, Junmyeon cranes his neck to the side to let Chanyeol showers him with butterfly kisses along his neck.

These kisses. It tickles but something about it is sending chills to Junmyeon. He had his eyes closed while his hands circle around Chanyeol's shoulders. Soon, he feels a stronger suck just above his collarbone, making his eyes open wide as he lets out a whimper.

Both of them got stunned by the voice Junmyeon had made. Chanyeol recovers quicker as he goes back to kiss Junmyeon on his lips. Junmyeon could barely breathe when Chanyeol's pace keeps increasing like he's hungry for Junmyeon's lips. It's overwhelming for both of them but they wouldn't have it any other way.

"This can’t do." Chanyeol pulls back. To Junmyeon's confusion, Chanyeol even takes several steps away from him. "My room. _Now_." Chanyeol grabs Junmyeon’s hand then he marches down the hallway, tugging the dazed man.

As soon as they're in Chanyeol's bedroom, Chanyeol gently pushes Junmyeon down to lie on his bed. He didn’t turn on pendant light but he did with his night lamp. "Ch… Chanyeol," Junmyeon stutters as Chanyeol begins unbuttoning Junmyeon's shirt.

"What's wrong?" Chanyeol whispers near his ear. Gently, he gives a little kiss on it before planting another on Junmyeon's cheek. "Are you having second thoughts?" Chanyeol gives a look to Junmyeon that tells him that it's okay to say no. It really is. One word from Junmyeon and they can stop. Though, Chanyeol just hopes that Junmyeon wouldn't ask him to forget that this ever happened.

"I just..." Junmyeon sees the way Chanyeol's face turns to worry. He didn't think that seeing Chanyeol scared like this would break his heart. Truthfully, Junmyeon wants this. He does but he’s frightened.

However, Junmyeon _doesn't_ want to be frightened. He's been afraid all of his life even when there's nothing. So… Just for tonight, Junmyeon wants to give in to the sensation of bliss and forgets everything.

Once again, Junmyeon pulls Chanyeol down for a deep kiss. That was enough for Chanyeol to pick up where they left. His hand travels down to Junmyeon's hips to brush the warm skin under the shirt. Junmyeon gasps when he feels Chanyeol's hand slowly feeling him up from his stomach to his chest. _“Ahh, Ch…Chanyeol.”_

The sound Junmyeon makes, it's music to Chanyeol's ears. Seeing how Junmyeon's getting goosebumps under his touch, it serves as a motivation to Chanyeol. "One last time, Junmyeon. If you don't say it now, I'm not going to stop." Chanyeol breathes heavily.

Junmyeon can see that Chanyeol is still trying to hold back judging from his clenched jaw. It's very... endearing to see how much Chanyeol wants him. It might not show on Junmyeon's face but he too greatly wants Chanyeol. There's no way Junmyeon would want Chanyeol’s hands to stop now.

“Then don’t.” Carefully, Junmyeon slides Chanyeol's cardigan off from his shoulder before his slender fingers travel to Chanyeol's lips.

_This lips._

Junmyeon's first kiss. They should have done this earlier when both of them were madly in love with each other. He _too_ loves Chanyeol but he can't help this feeling of guilt rising in his heart. Afraid that his guilt would grow even bigger, Junmyeon gently brushes Chanyeol's bottom lip with his index finger. _Let’s just focus on this._

Chanyeol's face lights up with a grin. He takes Junmyeon's palm and kisses it repeatedly. Then, Junmyeon gasps at how Chanyeol maintains eye contact with him while his tongue licks between his fingers.

At the scene, Junmyeon's cheeks instantly flushed red. Lust is clouding in Chanyeol's eyes and that sends heat down to his lower region.

"I'll take care of you." Chanyeol mutters softly before kissing Junmyeon's temple.

Something about those words made Junmyeon wants to cry. He has been alone this whole time, taking care of himself in his own lonely world. This feels so much like a dream. Junmyeon nods his head.

For tonight, he lets Chanyeol takes care of him.


	3. Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: !! TW // mentions of minor violence, needles and blood. minor character death. mentions of abuse. !!

10.5k words

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_"Junmyeon,"_

_The woman's voice is gentle at calling his name. Usually, Junmyeon would imitate his mother's soft voice as he replies. However, Junmyeon has been refusing to talk to his parents since dinner yesterday. It will only infuriate him even further._

_"You're not still angry at us, are you?" Unlike his mother, his father is more light-hearted as he chuckles. He knows. His father is probably at the thought that Junmyeon is merely throwing a little tantrum. Out of anger, Junmyeon had told everyone at the dining table that he won't be talking to them if they refuse to back down from their 'big' decision._

_To this, Junmyeon maintains his silence. Eyes gazing out of the car window because he knows he'll feel bad upon seeing the concern on his mother's face. "Honey, you know we are doing this for a good cause."_

_That's the last straw. Junmyeon finally opens his mouth to retort. "What good cause? It's dangerous!"_

_"It's not dangerous!" His father tries to reason out for the third time since yesterday. "They are just going to run some test on us and see if—"_

_"You two are not lab rats!" By now, Junmyeon is throwing the second round of fit. This is not usual for him. Junmyeon is not the type of son who would raise his voice at his parents rudely. However, he has a VERY valid reason for doing so. "I don't trust these doctors. What if suddenly things go wrong? Do they even work with the government?"_

_"No... But listen, Junmyeon. They are willing to pay—"_

_Junmyeon groans, cutting off his mother’s sentence. He's tired of the repeated argument again and again. No matter how much these people are willing to pay them, it's not worth the life-threatening risk. "No! We don't know what they'll put you under! Besides, we_ are _humans. No different than others. Both of you taught me that." So tell him again why they are needed to go under needles as if they are some animals._

_The two at the front seats sigh before their son. Junmyeon knows that he is on the correct side. They're humans. Just because his family is a little different, does not mean they're subjected to being scientists’ little toys._

_"It'll be good for your future." His father mutters, a little sternly this time. "Think about your future education. We are not like the Park family where money is just within a snap of the fingers."_

_"Dad, don't bring Chanyeol into this." Junmyeon's anger level is rising. Actually, no. He rather walks to school than have this conversation that doesn't go anywhere again. "Stop the car."_

_"Junmyeon, I swear to—" The blond teen is already unbuckling his seatbelt. Figuring how serious Junmyeon is, his mother quickly demands his father to pull over by the side of the road. His father did stop the car eventually. Once the vehicle is motionless, Junmyeon’s father turns his head around to give him a strict glare. "What is this behaviour, Kim Junmyeon? I did not raise you to be this rude!"_

_"Is it rude that I am trying to save my parents from being manipulated by strangers?" Junmyeon retorts with his arms crossed._

_"Stranger? This woman is the town's pride. Her work saved lives!"_

Ugh _, this again, Junmyeon rolls his eyes. Dr Ami may have made the town proud with her contribution to a research team but this is a completely different matter. Besides, Junmyeon finds it hard to trust someone who is using their social status in society into getting what they desire._

_Junmyeon exhales heavily as he opens the car door._

_If this is the only way for Junmyeon to protest his parents’ decision, so then be it. He’ll walk to school even if his legs give out halfway. When it comes to the lives of his two most precious people, Junmyeon wouldn’t hesitate._

_"Mom. Dad. You need to understand that I love— NO! LOOK OUT!!!" Junmyeon shouts._

_The last thing Junmyeon saw was the fast speeding car heading towards them._

_The last thing he hears was the loud sound of crashing that will forever change his life._

_"They're going to find you."_

Junmyeon wakes up gasping for air. It's as if he wasn't breathing the whole time he was dreaming. Even when the dream is over, the nightmare isn't. His parents are still dead and Junmyeon's hands are still dirty from his sins in the past.

No, he breathes out. It's getting hard to take breaths again. His head is spinning around and slowly, Junmyeon is losing his touch with reality.

_"They'll find you!"_

No! No! They can't! Junmyeon wants to vomit. When he tries to get out of the bed, Junmyeon realizes that he's not at home. His anxiety skyrockets at the fact that he's out from his safe house. He feels a slight pain at his lower back and that startles Junmyeon. What is this pain?!

He wanted to scream. Where is he?!

The room isn't exactly dark despite no electrical lights are on. Only the moonlight that shines the room. That itself is enough to make the whole room visible. Looking to his left, he's not alone.

_Chanyeol?_

His heartbeat quickens. In midst of his spinning head, a particular memory comes into his mind.

_" You… write about mythical creatures." Junmyeon comes to a conclusion as he scans the two books._

_Chanyeol nods. "I have always like to write about them. I did a lot of research too. It wasn't easy." Chanyeol explains as he sits down in his leather chair. "I even had to meet some experts to learn more about them. It wasn't an easy process... But I did make quite a few close friends along the way."_

No! Chanyeol's going to kill him! He'll tell his ‘expert’ friends that he has seen a rabbit-shifter before. Even if he promises, Chanyeol would write a book about him. Just like how he did with his previous work. Everyone is going to ask his source and Chanyeol will tell people about Junmyeon!

 _They'll find him…_ Chanyeol will lead them to him.

And Junmyeon… he'll be subjected to pain again. Junmyeon will go through hell once more. He refuses! He refuses to go back! He's not going to give himself again!

Tears start pooling in his eyes. Junmyeon feels like losing himself again. Every time. Every single time Junmyeon had those bad dreams, he succumbs easily to his demons.

_I have to get rid of him._

Chanyeol isn’t a heavy sleeper. He's easily woken up by a slight noise. That's why he's a morning person due to the birds chirping loudly outside. That is easily his cue to wake up.

However, this time, Chanyeol is awake after hearing sniffles above him. Slowly, Chanyeol pries his eyes open but he barely able to register anything. What's unusual is that Chanyeol feels a heavy weight on his stomach and he can hardly move.

"What...?"

Uneasily, Chanyeol moves his hand to turn the night lamp on and when the room is bright, Chanyeol's heart drops into his stomach. Junmyeon is sitting on his stomach as both of his hands are holding a vase above his head. The blond's face is brimming with tears but Chanyeol's more focus on Junmyeon's stance.

Due to the sudden blinding light, Junmyeon winces as his eyes are stinging in pain. Chanyeol takes Junmyeon being unfocused as a chance to knock over the vase from the blond male’s hold. The vase falls onto the floor with a loud crash. Toughly, Chanyeol pushes Junmyeon away until the man falls back on the mattress next to him.

 _He was going to hurt me._ Chanyeol sweats in horror. There was no mistaking it. Junmyeon did look like he was about to crash the vase on his head.

At the thought, Chanyeol desperately tries to move away from Junmyeon which ended up with him falling off the bed. Unfortunately, he falls just beside the broken pieces of the vase and that caused his palm to accidentally press against one of the shards.

Chanyeol looks up to see Junmyeon is staring at him, petrified. Why is the latter looking so terrified when Chanyeol is the one who should be fearing for his life?

The man he loves was trying to hurt him.

"How could you?!" Chanyeol shouts. He can feel his eyes are starting to water. "Right after we made love?!"

Junmyeon stays unmoving on the bed. He didn't say anything. Actually, Chanyeol's not sure what he expects Junmyeon to do now that he is caught red-handed. He doesn't even know what to do himself. Should he call the police? Should he continue running?

All Chanyeol could feel right now is a thousand knives penetrating through his heart. So this is what betrayal feels like.

"Wh… What have I done…" Junmyeon mumbles to himself while he backs away. The blond male’s hands are trembling at the sight of Chanyeol’s fearful eyes. After realizing what he had done, Junmyeon holds both sides of his head as tears continuously roll out from his eyes. "I didn't mean to... I wasn't..." the blond's back hits the window with a loud thud.

"Sir! What's going on?! I heard a loud crash!” The door of the room is suddenly slammed open, revealing Minji at the door. Her eyes widened after seeing the two naked men; one on the floor and one by the window. Unsurprisingly, she screams as she runs out of the room to search for the butler instead.

"I'm sorry, Chanyeol." Junmyeon sobs as he slowly shrinks down.

He's transforming!

In just a matter of seconds, his friend is no longer visible and what's left is a white rabbit. The rabbit hops off right pass him in a speed of light without looking back. At Junmyeon’s absence, Chanyeol feel his heart breaks again as he forlornly sits on the floor with his bleeding hand.

"Sir, your hand!" A man's voice, his butler, comes to his aid. The old man approaches Chanyeol to cover him with a blanket before he calls Minji to come inside. "What happened here...?"

Chanyeol was only saying it in his head. He's been repeating the words ever since he fell out of the bed.

Junmyeon tried to kill me…

Junmyeon tried to kill me…

Chanyeol had never believed that the rumours of Junmyeon killing someone was true. He didn't even believe when Junmyeon said it himself.

Turns out...

_Junmyeon tried to kill him._

"We should call the police then!" His butler declares.

"What?" Chanyeol is finally brought back to his senses.

The old man repeats. "You said he tried to kill you. We should call the authorities now!"

"No!" Chanyeol hurriedly stands up. If Junmyeon gets caught... that would be dangerous for the blond. Chanyeol wanted to laugh. Even in this situation, Chanyeol still cares deeply for the man. "Don't do anything!" Chanyeol shouts as he runs off from his room.

"Your hand!" The butler and Minji shout at the same time.

Chanyeol has never run down the stairs so fast. It’s dangerous that Junmyeon is still in his animal form. Junmyeon shouldn’t risk transforming back when everybody could possibly be awake right now. Turns out Chanyeol’s right. Junmyeon in his rabbit form is wandering in front of his front door. He probably wants to shift back to human but there are maids present there, seemingly confused as to why there's a rabbit in the house.

As Chanyeol nears the front door, his heart keeps pounding. Usually, it beats fast in a way that Chanyeol gets butterflies in his stomach. But this time... it's gut-wrenching. Chanyeol's face is finally tainted with devastation as he stops just in front of the rabbit.

Biting back his sobs, Chanyeol exhales shakily. "Why?"

The rabbit flinches at his voice. There's a small sound coming out of Junmyeon. Similar to a whine. Chanyeol wants to know what the hell is going on but he's lost.

"Sir!"

Chanyeol laments at the sight of his two helpers trailing after him.

Whatever did happen... Chanyeol can't bear for Junmyeon to be captured. With a heavy heart, Chanyeol turns the doorknob and opens the door. In a blink of an eye, Junmyeon exits through the slight gap of the door and into the snow.

Junmyeon didn’t even stop as he sprints so fast.

As soon as Junmyeon is out of his sight, Chanyeol falls onto the ground. His hand might be bleeding but he'll take another slash on his palm than this heartbreak.

It's been 3 days since the incident. Chanyeol has been anything but alive. The blond male didn't come to see him. Not like Chanyeol expects him to. His booze stash is slowly being cleared. That's the only thing that is making the pain in his chest bearable.

Over the past 3 days, nothing much has happened. Chanyeol didn't go out. If anything worth telling, it's Minji who decided to resign. She said that her mother was worried sick about having her daughter in close contact with a 'murderer'. To be honest, Chanyeol finds himself not giving any attention even the slightest bit.

Junmyeon's a murderer?

Even if he wasn't in the past but he was about to be with Chanyeol being his victim.

Chanyeol wonders where it all went wrong. He gave everything to Junmyeon. His time. His heart. His love and not even a day later, this is what he gets in return.

Taking another gulp directly from the bottle, Chanyeol lets another tear falls.

“Sir." His butler arrives by his side. Chanyeol only gives a hum of acknowledgement. The man takes the wine bottle from Chanyeol's hand before placing it on the table. "You have a guest. It's Taeyeon."

_Taeyeon?_

Whatever. Chanyeol doesn't give a shit if Taeyeon sees him like this. "Bring her in."

It’s been a while. Chanyeol shuts every visitors that try to come and see him. It’s surprising that it takes this long for the woman to stop by. Her heels clack as she steps in the house. Chanyeol only gives her a chuckle when her face shows up in a mixture of confusion and pity.

"Surprise?" Chanyeol greets her with scattered empty bottles on the table and floor.

"You look awful." Taeyeon takes a sit on the sofa adjacent to him. Her tone bears a little disappointment after looking at Chanyeol.

The tall man could only laugh as he retrieves the uncapped wine on the table. "What a coincidence. I _feel_ awful as well."

"I didn’t expect any less from this." Taeyeon mumbles to herself. However, it is loud enough for Chanyeol to hear it. Taeyeon sighs as she takes off her gloves and keeps it on her lap. "The word has gotten out. About you two.”

Immediately, Chanyeol sits up in his seat from having his back leaned flat on the sofa. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know what happened but there are people saying that Junmyeon tried to kill you."

 _Great_. Just great.

Chanyeol should’ve figured out that one of his maids would blabber. Now everybody knows. The whole town is probably cheering on how they were correct about having to be cautious around Junmyeon.

 _God_. Chanyeol just can't wrap his head around this reality. Just a week ago they were seeing the sunset and laughing together. And now... there's nothing. Their years’ worth of memories could never win with this bitter one. "Do you believe them?" Chanyeol frowns as he takes another gulp. He looks over to see Taeyeon frowning.

"I hoped to have decided after I've seen you. And now that I have..."

Chanyeol lips are pressed into a thin line. He can’t refute that claim. Taeyeon probably feels as betrayed as he is. "Don’t you find it hard to believe? Someone as loveable as Junmyeon would do that."

Maybe it was just to him—nope. Not maybe. Only him who saw Junmyeon in light of innocence. Taeyeon too but that was because she sympathizes Junmyeon. However, Chanyeol knows Taeyeon has her doubts considering how she can’t seem to answer Chanyeol’s question. As if she did expect this.

Whether Junmyeon did it or not, what does she care? But Chanyeol... he loves this man. He loves him so much.

"The townspeople had a meeting among them. They were discussing about Junmyeon." Taeyeon begins again. Her tone is close to resembling annoyance. "Why did this town have to be so small?"

Chanyeol's ears perk up. This is not good. Junmyeon is already being despised even after a decade and this will surely make things worse. "What did they say?"

"They said..." Taeyeon pauses as she fiddles with her thumbs. "If they see Junmyeon anywhere near the town, they'll start throwing pebbles and rocks again."

At that moment, Chanyeol realizes a broken heart can shatter even more. Rocks and pebbles? _Again? "_ Did he go through that years ago?"

Taeyeon nods at the question.

Of course, why wouldn't that happen? According to this town, Junmyeon’s the worst criminal that walked freely. If this was a month ago, Chanyeol would easily say they are all lies.

But now... he doesn't even know anymore.

"I would like to be alone." Chanyeol mutters finally. Showing this side of Chanyeol to Taeyeon is more burdensome than he had imagined. If she sees him shedding a tear, it would gravely unease them both. "Thank you, Taeyeon."

Taeyeon knows a grieving man should be left alone. She came here to confirm one thing and she got it. Though... the confirmation she got was the last answer that she had hoped for. A part of her life has ended here.

Now... She doesn't think she can see Junmyeon again...

"Contact me if anything happens." Taeyeon states before she rose up. As she walks towards the door, she stopped next to Chanyeol and squeezes the man's shoulder. "Whichever you decide to do, Chanyeol... I hope you won't regret it." With that, she takes her leave while her words ring repeatedly in Chanyeol's ear.

A decision that he won't regret? Chanyeol doesn't even know what to feel, more so a decision to make.

Now that he's alone again in the living room, his tears fall like raindrops from his eyes.

Chanyeol was wrong.

No matter how much he drinks, it still hurts. The fact that he wanted to hate Junmyeon for even thinking of doing the worst but he can't bring himself to despise the man.

Crouching down, his body is wracked with sobs and cries.

_Please. What should I do now?_

In the end, Chanyeol is a fool. If he were in a horror story, he would be the most frustrating character.

Because right now...

He is standing in front of Junmyeon's house with Junmyeon's blue cloak in his hands. That's not the heart-breaking part. When he arrives at the doorstep, Chanyeol is surprised to find holes in Junmyeon's window. The door is also slightly ajar. Chanyeol's jaw tightened at the word "murderer" carved on the door.

As he enters the living room, it was a total blasphemy. Almost like a burglar had come in. The already worn-out sofa is now decorated with lines of slashes. Not a single item made of glass in here that is not broken.

There it is again, the word "murderer."

Standing in the middle of the living room, just a week ago they were here. They were on that sofa. At that time, Chanyeol thought he had it all. His whole world, he had it near him. Closing his eyes, Chanyeol can feel the warmth of the firewood. He can hear Junmyeon's giggles and the sound of Junmyeon's pencil scratching against the paper.

Just how fast everything was gone in a blink of an eye.

 _It's suffocating_ , Chanyeol falls to the ground. He doesn't have his liquor by him but he wishes he had. Leaning his back on what's left of the sofa, Chanyeol exhales heavily.

Junmyeon's not here. Even if he is, can they face each other? Coming here itself is a risk. Sitting here unguarded is putting his life on the line because Junmyeon can come out of the blue and hurt him. The craziest thing isn't the fact that his best friend was trying to kill him.

It is the fact that Chanyeol didn't mind if it meant he can see Junmyeon right now. He just wants to see his childhood friend…

There's no way everything was a lie.

Chanyeol thought that he was alone in the house. However, the sound of the door creaking startles him as he sits up. "Junmyeon?!" Chanyeol calls out spontaneously. A little pathetic of him but what does he care.

Unfortunately... it's not Junmyeon.

It's a man, a stranger coming in into this house. Chanyeol's shoulders sag again. "If you're here to terrorize the house, it has already been done." He says bitterly.

"I'm not here to do that." The man slowly makes his way to Chanyeol. Unlike what Chanyeol had expected, this man scans around the room looking rather thwarted at the condition of the house. If he comes to turn this house upside down, then shouldn’t he be happy? Other than Taeyeon and himself, Chanyeol doesn't know who else in this town who wouldn't be happy seeing the house of "murderer" being a wreck. "Actually, I am here to see you. Park Chanyeol, right?"

 _Him?_ This stranger could be the police. Or a journalist. Although… his dressing states otherwise. "How did you know I was here?"

"I came by to your house and they said you were gone. My first hunch was to come here." The man explains.

"Well, you have found me. Congratulations." Chanyeol remarks sarcastically as he is up on his feet. "Now what is it that you want from me?"

"It's about Jun—"

"Of course, it's about him." Chanyeol cuts the other off. He walks over to one of Junmyeon's broken windows to stare at the snow outside. He wonders how Junmyeon is coping with the thick snow. Can he even move within them? "What did you say your name was again?" Chanyeol asks.

"I didn't. But we've met before. At the market.”

 _Ah..._ Now Chanyeol remembers. The one who took over Grandma May stall. "Right. Are you here to confirm whether he did try to kill me or not too? Is that it?"

He's not the first one. Chanyeol wouldn't count Taeyeon because the woman is their friend and it's her right to know. But not the others that were herding in front of his house, what a menace. It's a relief that none of them knew the existence of the back gate. That was Chanyeol's only escape.

Then again, it doesn't matter much. One of them manages to find him. "You can tell all the others that they can believe whatever they heard."

"I'm not talking about that." Joowon says.

_Oh, he's not?_

"I'm just wondering if you know his secret."

Chanyeol's hand that was drawing circles on the window stills. The last word manages to capture Chanyeol's full attention. "Secret?" The brunet turns around to face him. "What are you trying to say?"

The man lightly walks towards him, only stopping a metre away. "If he did try to harm you, I believe there's a reason. An awfully important reason. And I can't think any other reason that can push him to do that if it isn’t... his secret."

Chanyeol is speechless. The man... he is talking about Junmyeon's ability, isn’t he? "Who are you to him?" Chanyeol finds himself asking. Why does he sound like he knows Junmyeon well?

Joowon bites his lips before fisting the hem of his shirt. Chanyeol can see how the man is trying to stop his own trembling hand. "How much are you willing to hear?"

 _Oh, God_. Chanyeol's expression turns desperate. "Everything. Tell me, everything!"

"Chanyeol. Knowing too much can be burdensome. So—"

"I don't care!" Chanyeol shouts. "I've been questioning everything about this place ever since I've arrived here. All I want... is to stop questioning. But it keeps adding up day by day and the questions get even tougher for me. So that’s why," the taller is holding Joowon's shoulder firmly. "If you have the answers to all my questions even the ones that haven't crossed in my head, tell me. _Please_."

It's pathetic. Simply pathetic that Chanyeol is begging to find a reason to prove that his childhood friend was still alive the whole time they were together. That all these days with him wasn't a lie. Despite nothing that can justify Junmyeon's behaviour, Chanyeol still wants to listen to it.

Joowon nods to Chanyeol's gratitude. "Alright. Come with me to my house. I will explain everything."

And that's how Chanyeol finds himself in a car going to Joowon's house. The man refuses to tell him even just a little in the car and that made Chanyeol even more anxious. He didn't even answer the question on who he is to Junmyeon.

One thing that's obvious...

This person knows the current Junmyeon a lot better than Chanyeol does.

The ride didn't take long thankfully. Joowon's house is small... but it's comfortable. _Very_ comfortable. It is, after all, Grandma May’s house. No wonder it has an old feeling to it. Joowon kept himself busy by making drinks for them both. Impatient, Chanyeol just wishes that Joowon would just straightaway sit down and tell him. "I know that you're very curious but let's not rush things." Joowon says as he brings a tray of hot drinks to the table. "Besides, the story isn't a short one. Neither it's a happy one."

"I know that at least." Chanyeol replies referring to Joowon's last sentence. He wasn't exactly expecting a walk in the garden kind of story. That's why he is so nervous.

With an intake of air, Joowon then starts by sliding a photograph on the table. "You asked what I am to him..." Chanyeol takes the photo in his hands. _Oh..._ That's Junmyeon standing in front of his house with Dr Ami and... a boy. Chanyeol looks up to Joowon for answers.

"That's me..." Joowon explains. "I used to live with Junmyeon... and my mother…"

_Joowon didn't know why he was here. Neither did he know whose funeral this is. Everyone is wearing black and giving their prayers to the dead. Apparently, they're letting down two caskets. Two people who had died. That is what he manages to identify from inside of his car._

_The ceremony is over judging from his mother walking back to the car. Before she could, someone came by and stopped her for a chat. As usual, Joowon has been trained all his life to keep a low profile. Don't hold any eye contact with anyone. Don't talk to anyone unless given permission. It's been like that for as long as he can remember._

_"Is that your kid?" The stranger talking to his mother asks while he takes a pull of his cigarette._

_His mother glances back at Joowon and gives him a wink before turning forward. "Nope. Just babysitting."_

_Another thing about Joowon's existence..._

_.._

_... is that he doesn't exist._

_Being born out of wedlock, the 13 years old boy had a tougher life than his peers. He was always home-schooled and now that they are moving to his mother's hometown, it will still be the same._

_Joowon doesn't quite understand why he has to keep it a secret but he is not exactly complaining about his life._

_"Did you see him? With the blond hair. That's their son." The man utters._

_Smoke keeps blowing out from his mouth. Joowon's mother hated smokers as evident on how she keeps fanning herself with her hand. "I know. I saw. He's a lot more grown-up than I thought."_

_"Would it be easy?"_

_Ami shrugs. "We lost two good test subjects. We can't afford to lose another one."_

_"What makes you think he would agree?"_

_Ami chuckles as she crosses her arms against her chest. "That's why I'm taking that boy into my care. It would be easier for me to observe him, don't you think?"_

_Joowon has very little understanding of what his mother’s conversation with this man is. Nor did he care that much. But his mother did say that they're to live with another boy and that boy could be his friend._

_Perhaps... the one boy remaining in front of the two graves is him._

_Joowon has always been praised to be smart by his home-schooled teachers. He's grateful for that. But sometimes he thinks it's better to stay ignorant._

_He tastes his first family feud in this house near the lake that they've settled in. He stands corrected when his mother introduced him to the blonde-haired boy from the funeral._

_However, his mother lied. This Junmyeon... can't be his friend._

_"Eat!" His mother puts Junmyeon's plate on the table, a little harshly. Joowon internally sighs as they’re about to fight again. Junmyeon looks skinnier as compared to when Joowon met him the first time. The blond eyes the plate with disgust. "Did you put something in there? You're going to drug me again, aren’t you?"_

_"You—" His mother stops her sentence halfway as she turns to look at Joowon in alarmed. She lets out an exasperated sigh while folding her sleeves. "Joowon, if you're done eating, you can go play outside."_

_That's a cue for him to leave._

_It's always like that. Joowon didn't even get finish his favourite meal when he goes out of the kitchen with a frown. Sometimes Joowon wonders what the point is. He can still hear them fighting at any corner he sits._

_It's a little tiring._

_"What did I say about talking on these things in front of Joowon." From outside, Joowon can hear his mother's angry voice. Lately, it has been her frame of mind most of the time._

_He can also hear Junmyeon scoffs. "You think he doesn't know what you've done to me? The chemicals you put in my body?"_

_"Neither of those are harming you.”_

_"Then why is it painful!" Junmyeon shouts, showing his arms that have so many injection shots. Joowon who was peeking from the door winces after seeing his bruised arms. "I beg you! Just stop!"_

_While Junmyeon is having another breakdown, his mother seems unaffected. She continues washing the plates in the sink with a light hum. "It won't take long, Junmyeon. Just bear it down like a man."_

_Junmyeon laughs. The blond falls onto the ground with a very bitter laugh. "Like a man? You can say that when you're treating me like a rat in a lab…"_

_"So what are you going to do about it? Report me?" The corner of her lips slightly curves up. It is as if she's saying_ ‘if you dare’ _to Junmyeon. Joowon knows that threatening look. She always pulls that expression to get things to go her way. In many times, Joowon thinks it was cool that his mother has power with just her smile._

_But in this case... Joowon finds it terrifying._

_"You spread the words that I am crazy. To my teachers, my friends." Junmyeon chuckles bitterly. "The town thinks that I have lost my mind. I couldn't run even if I wanted to."_

_He did try. Joowon remembers that one time when Junmyeon didn't come home for 2 days and his mother had the scariest tantrum Joowon had ever seen in his years living. 2 days later, the policemen brought Junmyeon home who looked utterly defeated._

_Joowon feels... pity for Junmyeon._

_"Why don't you just kill me, Ami?" Junmyeon's voice breaks as he hugs his knees on the floor. "I might as well just die sooner or later."_

_Ami finishes the dishes by wiping her hands dry with a towel. She turns around to look at Junmyeon. There's not even the slightest hint of sympathy in her eyes. "Your parents’ last wish is to help me.”_

_"You're not their last wish." Junmyeon counters angrily._

_"Oh but I am." She walks towards Junmyeon then crouches down. At the action, Junmyeon severely flinches. "Your parents wanted to help me... for you, Junmyeon. And how did you repay them?" The woman leans down to Junmyeon's ear and whispers. "You killed them."_

_"I didn't!" Junmyeon wails, moving backwards from Joowon's mother. However, Junmyeon hasn't been eating for days so he's very weak against Ami's hold on his leg. "You said it yourself. If you didn't force your father to stop the car, they wouldn't be in an accident!" By this time, she's already shouting, scaring both Joowon and Junmyeon. "They would still be here! A help to me and to science! But you… You and nobody else... killed them! Killed everyone's future!"_

_Junmyeon has his back facing Joowon. But his shoulders are shaking very hard as he clutches his own head. "Stop... s… stop." Junmyeon cries as he curls into a ball. "I... I... didn't."_

_"The only way you could atone your sins is by helping me and my team." The woman rises up and takes off her apron. "Or else... don't even think about seeing them in Heaven." She spat before walking out of the back door, leaving the blond male weeping on the kitchen floor._

_Hearing Junmyeon’s cries, Joowon feels so sorry for him. When his mother is working, the woman seems so much scarier. He wanted to give a hug to Junmyeon but Junmyeon has never talked to him more than a sentence._

_Seeing how Junmyeon cries while calling for his parents, the stuffiness in his heart grows._

_Unintentionally, Joowon too cries while watching Junmyeon hugs himself with agony all over his face._

_Joowon wakes up one night with the sound of a crash outside of his room. He instantly runs outside of his room and as soon as he did, he sees Junmyeon sprinting down the stairs with his nightgown. His mother got out of Junmyeon's room 2 seconds later. When their eyes met briefly, his mother shouts. "Stay in the room!"_

_Joowon hurriedly obliged. However, his heart isn't at peace hearing the two in a brawl downstairs. He can hear both of them shouting and Joowon is very much afraid._

_In the end, curiosity killed the cat. He slowly descends down the stairs, careful to not give out his presence. At a place that’s barely visible, he peeks his head slightly to see what is going on. Joowon’s stomach churns at the shrilling scream from Junmyeon. Below, his mother has Junmyeon pinned down on the ground as she sits on top of Junmyeon's thighs with both of her hands holding Junmyeon in place._

_Joowon wonders why Junmyeon didn't push her off but seeing Junmyeon's body, how the man is covered in bruises and he resembles a walking skeleton, Joowon doubts Junmyeon has the energy to do that._

_"I don't want to do that anymore!" Junmyeon writhes under Ami's hold. “I refuse!”_

_"You can't!" She yells. "I'm very close to being the first person to discover a mutant. I will not let my future goes to waste!"_

_"Get off me." Junmyeon succeeds in pushing her off this time. She tumbles backwards with a groan and Junmyeon takes this opportunity to run. However, before he could do so, Joowon's mother manages to use her foot to trip Junmyeon back down the floor. As soon as Junmyeon falls, Ami takes the syringe that she's been holding and stabs it on Junmyeon's calf._

_The blond man yells in pain. While he was clutching his own leg, suddenly Junmyeon started shrinking and he transforms into a... rabbit._

_Joowon feels like he is reading a fantasy book. He didn't think such things exist._

_However, he is not surprised. He's been overhearing his mother’s conversation with her workmates. Furthermore, the papers that she has plastered on her board is enough to serve as the evidence. Even so, it was nothing more than just a hunch but he's seeing it unfold for the first time. Joowon pinches his arm to make sure that he’s not dreaming._

_The rabbit didn't run away. He only stayed on the ground, fidgeting in place. His mother comes closer to the white ball of fur and picks him up by the ears. The rabbit lets out a squeak so loud that it sounded really painful. "You are such a gifted person, Junmyeon. Sadly, you're a disappointment. If it wasn't for your blood, I would have just let you starve by the streets." She clicks her tongue._

_It's a nightmare. Joowon can't withstand to hear the animal’s agony screeching nor can he see his mother slowly resembling a bad person. Why is she like this? Joowon wishes for his mother to let go of the ears because it looks so painful for the rabbit._

_Eventually, Junmyeon turns back into a human, disappearing the bunny ears from the woman's grasp. With a loud thud, Junmyeon falls onto the ground and he's naked from the bottom to up._

_"I... I can't move my..." Junmyeon cries, clutching his calf where the needle was injected. He slides on the floor using his upper strength, trying to head to the door._

_"Where do you want to go, Junmyeon? You can't escape this life." The woman lazily stares at the worn-out male. She's also panting from having so worked up to prevent Junmyeon from fleeing. "You're making my work three times harder, do you know that? I should have just drained your blood dry and toss you away." The woman grits her teeth in annoyance._

_"You want to kill me?" Junmyeon laughs in midst of tears. "Why didn't you do it earlier?"_

_The woman scoffs. "I should have. Maybe then we don't have to go through this every night, right?"_

_They've been doing this every night?! The ruckus that sometimes wakes Joowon up wasn’t because of a raccoon like his mother had said? Then… It was Junmyeon in torturous pain all along? Now, Joowon thinks he doesn't even know this woman in front of him anymore._

_"I'll...k...kill you first." Junmyeon coughs with a death glare._

_This only serves as an amusement to Ami. "How adorable." She laughs. Her hand goes to reach in her pocket and pulls out a cigarette. "You really made me pick up all the habits that I hated, huh." She puffs out. "Let me tell you something, Junmyeon. Maybe this is your fate to end up as a poor miserable thing." She says, pretending to be sad._

_The blond male moans in pain when his hair is being pulled harshly. "S… stop." He croaks out. His face is wet with a mix of sweat and tears._

_The woman stares at the miserable face before she places the cigarette between her lips. With her free hand, she slaps Junmyeon across the face, making Joowon clamps his mouth hard to prevent himself from gasping. "You want to kill me? Sure, go ahead. But remember, little Junmyeon." She throws Junmyeon's head aside. "Even if you report me which lead to my team being sent to jail, there will be others that will find you. And maybe this time, they wouldn't be so forgiving like I am."_

_Junmyeon tries to sit up, using the mini dresser to stabilize himself._

_"Maybe the new experts will lock you up in the room and torture you with more tools. You will always be under needles thanks to your special DNA.” After her threat, she then goes to the telephone on the wall and begins dialling._

_"Hello? Yeah, it's me." She says while taking off her rubber gloves. "I need you to send more of those anaesthetic and propofol to my house right now. A stronger one, if you may."_

_While Joowon's mother is talking to the phone, Junmyeon is still bawling his eyes with his hands clamping on each side of his ear. Joowon wants to ask why he is doing that._

_"I can't get rid of him_ yet _. No, everything is fine.... Yes, I know this is illegal! Just shut up and do it! And come fast!" His mother yells then slams the receiver back onto the wall._

 _The boy at the stairs gulps. If that wasn't clear enough, this means that his mother does plan on killing Junmyeon._ Oh, god _. It feels like his dinner is going to come out from his stomach._

_"This is such a menace." The woman sighs out loud with her hands on her hips. "I need to get you to bed." She groans as she walks up to Junmyeon who is leaning against the table._

_Sensing that they'll probably be heading up the stairs, Joowon quietly tries to crawl up and escape the scene. However... before he could, he hears his mother’s cries of pain._ _Joowon turns his attention back to the two of them, just in time, his mother falls onto the ground while clutching her stomach. "You... son of a bitch!" She screams._

_It feels like every air in Joowon's lung rushes out as he stares at the blood slowly dampening his mother's shirt. Joowon wanted to move to his mother but his feet stay frozen in place._

_Junmyeon drops the pocket knife that he was holding while his hands are trembling like crazy, just like how Joowon is shivering right now._ _"Damn it, why can't I transform?!" Junmyeon falls back on the ground. Grabbing his discarded nightgown, Junmyeon wears it again and was ready to flee when he hears Ami calls his name._

_"Junmyeon... Are you that stupid?" She laughs but soon coughs out blood from her mouth. "You won't survive out there. You have no money. No one will take you after knowing what you’ve done. Certainly not with that numb leg of yours."_

_"I don’t care. I just want to get out of this hell!"_

_"Leaving everything that was your parents’ behind?"_

_Junmyeon steps halt just as he already has a foot out. "What?"_

_"I know how much your parents struggle to keep this ancestral house. They sacrificed a lot, didn't they to get this house back before they had you."_

_"How did you know?"_

_"You think I didn't do a background check on my subjects?" She pants. Her eyes are slowly drooping. "Go ahead. Disappoint your parents one last time. May their death be in vain when the townspeople burn this house alive."_

_"No... They won't." Junmyeon stutters. He looks around this room with fear pooling in his eyes._

_"But they will. You know they will—” she coughs again. “I'll make sure they do."_

_"Quiet!"_

_"You're not going to live a full life, Junmyeon. Anyone who knows your secret will come for you. They'll find a way to capture a creature like you! You won't be free!"_

_"I will be free!" Junmyeon picks up the pocket knife that was on the floor and strikes it to her heart._

_Joowon who was watching, instantly looks away. Other than Junmyeon, Joowon too is crying. He's so terrified._

_"They... they'll find you." Ami croaks out one last time before all strength left her body._

_Seeing how his mother's eyes flutter close, Joowon bites his own hand to prevent himself from screaming._

_The blond male whose hand now is tainted with blood instantly falls back with a loud scream. His cries are so painful even for Joowon who had just seen his mother being stabbed to death._

_After calming himself down, Joowon sags against the wall. Even after witnessing a traumatizing scene, Joowon strangely harbours no ill intention towards Junmyeon. His mother wasn't a nice person. Now he really wished that he had stayed in his room. Perhaps he will still live on with the idea of his perfect mother in his head. But then... he would have resented Junmyeon._

_Having enough of this, Joowon finally stands up from the stairs and runs towards his mother. "Mom!" Before he could reach her, Junmyeon yells again. "Stay back, Joowon! You have to!" The boy stops just next to the puddle of blood. "You have to leave, Joowon."_

_Joowon falls on his knees. "But my mother!"_

_"No one knows your existence Joowon. People will think you're my accomplice, so go!"_

_"Wh… where would I go?" Joowon stutters, staring at his mother's dead body. "What happens after this....?"_

_He looks over to Junmyeon and the man is looking at him apologetically. "I can't leave this house. I'll find my way. But you," Junmyeon glares at him. "Are you going to kill me?"_

_Joowon gulps. It should be natural that he would want to avenge for his mother. But knowing the truth, Joowon wants Junmyeon to be free instead. "No." He answers softly. "I won't tell anyone." The gaze on Joowon is too strong. It's a mixture of disbelief and doubt._

_"Then, go! Forget this life. Forget your mother! Forget me!" Junmyeon tells him. "If you breathe a word, there are some bad people that will come for you. So, please... For your survival sake. Go!"_

_"But you..."_

_"Don't care about me." Junmyeon mutters softly. Gently, he lies down next to the body, his white nightgown is tainted with red. "I can't run anymore." As the blond male closes his eyes, more tears roll down from the corner of his eyes._

_After hearing those words, Joowon nods his head and runs upstairs. He starts packing his clothes into a bag and bring any food with him. The last stop is his mother’s room. On her dressing table, there lies a picture of both of them._

_All this while, Joowon never minded that his existence was a secret. He never minded that he didn't have any friends. Sure he did as a kid but he understands the kind of situation his mother is in. But now... he’s going to leave all of them behind. Never once has he ever stepped outside without his mother's care. But this time, he is on his own._

_"I'm sorry." He wipes the tears on his cheek. "I'm sorry that I'm not mad enough to avenge for you." Joowon opens the drawers and takes his mother's necklace and pearls. This will come in handy for him._

_It's a messed up life he is suddenly pushed into. But Joowon will try to survive._

_After taking everything that he needs, Joowon descends down the stairs. He's not sure if Junmyeon is asleep or just resting, but Joowon walks pass them without turning back._

_He_ won't _turn back._

The chair screeches as Chanyeol harshly stands up. He cups his mouth in astonishment as he paces back and forth. If he didn't, Chanyeol thinks he couldn't calm his heart. Taking a deep intake of breath, Chanyeol exhales heavily with his hand against his forehead. "Are you lying to me?"

"There's no reason why I would." Joowon replies with his chin down.

Chanyeol thought that when Joowon tells him everything, the burden would finally be lifted from his shoulders. His heart would get lighter. Instead... it feels like the squeeze in his heart got stronger.

That wasn't all. Joowon then explains to him how after a week of the incident, the court ruled that Junmyeon was innocent. He suspects that the government must have found out about the illegal operation. It would create a scandal not just for this town but the whole world if this is known to the public. Thus, they buried the truth in the house. There are also rumours that Dr. Ami's team who were compromised of non-locals managed to be arrested. Again, the reason is undisclosed to the town. It wasn't big news since this town only focused on their people.

If what Joowon had said was true, then Junmyeon must have lived his life in fear, knowing that someone might appear and take his freedom away for the sake of science. If he were in Junmyeon’s shoes, it would have driven Chanyeol nuts. To think that all this time... Junmyeon still smile brightly to him.

Taeyeon and Joowon were right. This is no fairy-tale. For a period of time, Chanyeol thought he was happily living in one with Junmyeon...

Turns out it was just his own delusion.

"I know it doesn't matter. Junmyeon is still someone who tried to kill you and that you should avoid him. But I just..." Joowon pulls back the picture that's on the table. Every time he looks at it, his eyes begin to water. "I hoped at least there's one more person that could understand who Junmyeon truly is."

"Why?" Chanyeol questions. "You said it yourself, it won't change anything. So why tell me?"

Brown eyes pleading intently at Chanyeol. Joowon seems like he's as desperate as Chanyeol is. "Because for more than a decade I've been holding it in. There's no one I could tell this to. No one worthy of the truth." Finally, Joowon's cheeks are tainted with tears. "I managed to find a kind person to shelter me but Junmyeon…? Even after he was 'free', he was still hated by the people. But I can't say anything. I can't help him. He doesn't want me to. So this," Joowon runs up to Chanyeol and shakes Chanyeol’s shoulders. "Is the least I can do to him to atone my sins.”

Chanyeol gapes at the man that's sobbing hard in front of him. _It hurts._ Being betrayed hurts. Listening to the truth hurts. Seeing Joowon hurts. Everything feels like he is being impaled in the chest. "Now that I know," Chanyeol buries his face in his own hands. "What should I do?"

He can't find Junmyeon.

Joowon is right, this story doesn't change the fact that Junmyeon is dangerous to him. As long as Chanyeol knew his secret, Junmyeon is in a state of despair of his life. Now that he thinks back, the night in his house... Chanyeol must have scared him. Was it when he mentioned "experts"? Or was he already planned to do it right off the bat when Chanyeol knew?

He is a fool to think that after all that had happened to Junmyeon, everything could stay the same no matter how bad Junmyeon's past is.

Now...

Chanyeol isn't sure himself...

Days have passed since that day with Joowon. Chanyeol has the worst dark circles underneath his eyes. Almost at par when he was reaching the deadline of his writing. It’s been more than a month since he's been here but these past few days have been the worst.

Sleep seems so foreign for Chanyeol.

He can't help it. What Joowon told him keeps playing in his mind. Every night, Chanyeol fight the cold to stand outside his veranda to stare at the roof of Junmyeon's house. The house Junmyeon had stayed at. He remembers Junmyeon telling him that his parents went through hell to get that house. The newlywed couple at that time got kicked out due to property dispute.

It took them a lot to get their house back. Even this house has sentimental value to Chanyeol, he can't imagine how attached Junmyeon would be to his house.

Sadly, what remains of the house is nothing more than an abandoned home. Chanyeol stopped by the house every 3 hours, hoping to see Junmyeon. At least a glimpse of the white fur.

He never showed up though. Every day, Chanyeol would come home with a broken heart.

Today is another day at Junmyeon's house. Chanyeol has already swept the shattered glasses on the floor. He even reorganized the living room exactly as he can remember. Chanyeol feels stupid. He's not sure why he is doing all of this too. He should've just packed his stuff and left. Write a book about his heartache and make a fortune. But Chanyeol doesn't want to stop coming by. There's a thorn somewhere in him that he wants to pluck it out.

However, only Junmyeon has the ability to do so. That's why he's waiting. Even if Junmyeon might appear with a dagger against his neck.

Today, Chanyeol decides to clean up the 2nd floor. It was horrible as well but isn't as terrible as the ground floor. There are not much to thrash anyways on the 2nd floor.

Firstly, he decides to go into Junmyeon's room. Just like the last time he saw it, there is dirt being thrown on Junmyeon's bed. Unlike everyone’s room who possesses a wardrobe, Junmyeon only had rattan basket where he kept his folded clothes. _Used_ to since now his clothes are all torn apart.

This place wasn't like this. It had all of Junmyeon's favourite stuff from his cute little plants to his movie posters. It was a contrast to Chanyeol's room. This made Chanyeol wonder whether the reductions of the items in this house was due to Junmyeon selling it for money. That could be a plausible explanation.

It's just... it's heart-guttering to realize what Junmyeon had actually been through. If he knew, God, if Chanyeol knew Junmyeon was going through a lot, he would've come back here in a heartbeat. Maybe then he could still save Junmyeon.

Chanyeol walks around the bed to see the window. It's still there, where they had carved at the windowsill using a pair of scissors. They were ten when Junmyeon carved a _"C + J"_ on the wood. Chanyeol's fingers graze above it.

It was simpler back then.

Pushing those thoughts aside, Chanyeol starts to pick up Junmyeon's torn clothes on the ground. He's grateful that these people who vandalized Junmyeon’s home didn't go as far as pouring pig's blood. That will be hell to clean. Just as Chanyeol crouches down to pick another shirt, his eyes caught a black item hidden under the bed. Perhaps someone accidentally kicked it under. Without much thought, Chanyeol collects it up and places it on the nightstand.

Cleaning the bedroom didn't take as long as the living room. Junmyeon's room is quite small. Other than a dirty bed cover and the ruined clothes, Chanyeol didn't need to do much to make the room presentable again. Though Chanyeol chuckles to himself. Whom is he doing this for?

Will Junmyeon come back to this house?

He can only hope.

Fatigue is finally calling him as he sits on the old bed. What a strong bed that lasts for more than 20 years. While his hand roams on the bed, it stops just at the end where he sees the black book again on the nightstand.

No doubt it's Junmyeon's. If he has seen this before, Chanyeol for sure didn't remember. The book is evidently not new. Pretty old, he can tell. Chanyeol was just curious when he opens the book. Just like he had expected, it's Junmyeon's sketchbook.

It's just a bunch of stuff in the house that Junmyeon drew. Like the vase. The kitchen cabinet. A butterfly on Junmyeon's mother's flowerpot. The birdhouse that used to be placed on the tree near the house. It is then that Chanyeol realizes everything that was drawn were the objects that Chanyeol no longer found it now. It could be that these drawings were dated back then. It brings a little smile on Chanyeol's face to see Junmyeon's drawing. He can already imagine teenage Junmyeon sitting at an ungodly place just to draw.

However, the following pages after more than half of the book are empty. Around 5 pages or so it was blank before another piece of art appears. It isn't directly drawn on the sketchbook, instead, it is drawn on a piece of paper and then it is glued to the page.

Wait... Chanyeol mentally takes a step back. This is recent. It is the one that Junmyeon drew by the lake with him. The date at the bottom proves so. And then there's more. The next page is also another drawing he did on the day following that. And more of the days after.

A few pages of more flipping until Chanyeol stops at the final drawing of this sketchbook.

It is a picture of a hand.

At first, Chanyeol thought it was Junmyeon's hand. But after seeing it clearly, the fingers are a lot longer and the nails don’t resemble Junmyeon's rounded ones. Instead, it looks more like his.

 _It's my hand_ , Chanyeol smiles.

Junmyeon is really talented in drawing the details. They're pretty. His eyes travel down at the bottom of the page where there are words written in small handwriting. As Chanyeol proceeds to read the words, the smile on his face falls.

_"I wish I could warm his hand forever."_

Instantly, Chanyeol throws the book aside. For the umpteenth time, Chanyeol's lips tremor as his eyes are starting to sting again. He exhales into his hands before closing his eyes. If Junmyeon had wanted him for a long time then why did he do it?

Chanyeol is tired of crying. He doesn't think he can anymore but that notion is always proven false. _I want you here_. Chanyeol cries internally. Just once, please. Please come home.

"There you are!" Taeyeon appears out of the blue at the door, startling Chanyeol. The man feels like his heart was about to burst out when Taeyeon comes panting like she had been running. "Your butler said you're here. I came here as soon as I can."

Chanyeol could tell how out of breath Taeyeon is. Not to mention running in such dress. "What is it that's got you speeding?"

The woman didn't answer immediately. She takes her time filling her lungs with air before she finally calms herself. "Junmyeon..."

Just one word. One name and Chanyeol is next to her side. "You've heard from him?!"

To Chanyeol's surprise, Taeyeon nods her head. A bubble of hope sparks within him. "Where?!"

Instead of mentioning the location, Taeyeon hands him a letter. Chanyeol stared warily at it before he thoughtlessly opens it and reads it. Before Chanyeol had read it, he was already fearful due to Taeyeon's expression. She looks sad. After reading every line of the letter, Chanyeol finally understands why.

"No. No. Absolutely not." Chanyeol drops the letter. "I have to find him. I have to stop him. I know where he is!

Before Chanyeol could dash out, Taeyeon manages to stop him by the arm. She gives Chanyeol a sympathetic gaze as she shakes her head. "I've searched there." Taeyeon hiccups. "It's too late."

"No. No. No!" Chanyeol keeps repeating that word. This can't be it. Junmyeon can't be gone! There are so many things that Chanyeol still wants to say to the blond male! Chanyeol's glaring face couldn't have been Junmyeon's last memory of him.

Why are things like these?!

Chanyeol can't hold his sobs back any longer. He falls onto the ground, picking up the letter and clutches it to his heart. Taeyeon too couldn't hold her tears in after seeing Chanyeol breaking down in front of her. His desperate cries are just too painful to hear. Kneeling down on the floor, Taeyeon pulls Chanyeol into her embrace as she hushes Chanyeol. "It's going to be okay," She runs her palms on the man's back.

Chanyeol didn't care if he looked miserable right now. He just wants to cry his heart out.

_"Dear Chanyeol,_

_If you're reading this, it means Taeyeon has successfully given you the letter. The reason why I had left it at Taeyeon's house is because I am too ashamed to face you. I know you must have loathed me right now and I believe you have every right to."_

Chanyeol's alarm clock goes off, waking him up from his sleep. The first thing he does is head towards his bathroom to pick up his toothbrush and toothpaste.

This will be his last morning in this house.

_"If you ask me, Chanyeol, I was not in my right mind. Even now, I don't think I am. What happened that night, I regret it so much. I truly wish to die than living with the fact that I tried to harm you. I am so sorry, Chanyeol. My apology couldn't possibly fix the situation."_

The maid pours him his usual cup of coffee. At the beginning of his stay, his maids have always made his coffee sweet even though Chanyeol had requested less sugar. Now, on Chanyeol's last stay, they have already master perfectly Chanyeol's ideal morning coffee.

After his breakfast, Chanyeol with a slice of toast bread in his hand walks down the hallway towards his office room. Upon entering, everything has already been cleared and into the box. Chanyeol wonders how did his stuff become twice more than what he had originally brought here 6 months ago. Today, he needed four big boxes to fit in his stuff only in this room alone. Scanning the room, everything is already ready to go...

... except for one thing.

_"What I want you to know is that... I treasure our short time together. When you're around, I think I have found myself again. The old innocent and cheerful Junmyeon who loved painting more than anything else. You were the only one who ever saw me in that way and I connected to who I really am through you."_

Chanyeol picks up the one frame that is left on the table. It's the picture that Junmyeon drew of him. A lovely picture indeed. He remembers their talks by the fireplace. Junmyeon's laugh. Junmyeon's warm touch. His breath against his cheeks. Chanyeol finds himself smiling just thinking about them.

_"Do not worry about me, Chanyeol. I have met an old friend. He decided to start a new life out of this town rather than keep selling Grandma May's recipe. And I decided to live the rabbit life a while longer under his care. A bit silly of me but being a human is tiring. So, we'll be moving away somewhere far. "_

All of his boxes are already loaded into the truck. The weather is exceptionally good today. He lives his days here to see the season has changed once more. Just then, a familiar car stops right in front of him.

Taeyeon is finally here.

The chauffeur opens the door and ushers Chanyeol to step inside. Before Chanyeol does so, he spares one last glance to this house.

He is sure going to miss this place very much. It is his 2nd time parting with this house. Chanyeol heads inside and he meets Taeyeon who is smiling brightly at him. Chanyeol has yet to make himself comfortable in the car when Taeyeon shoves her palm in front of Chanyeol.

Shaking his head, Chanyeol takes out his house keys and places it in Taeyeon's hand.

Now it's back to Taeyeon to take care of the house.

"Are you ready to leave this place?" Taeyeon asks after the car has begun moving. Chanyeol can't say that he isn't sad. The view of this place is what he will miss the most. The air. The trees. The lake. _And most importantly..._

The car drives pass a certain area. Both Taeyeon and Chanyeol's eyes stare out of the window at the abandoned house before they share eye contact. Unconsciously, a smile appears on both of their faces.

_... the memories here._

_"Maybe we will meet in the future. Maybe we will not. Whatever destiny has for us, I just hope you know that I love you too, Chanyeol. Always have. Always will."_


	4. Epilogue

4.2k words

* * *

2 years later.

CLICK!

After his picture is taken, Chanyeol goes back to his seat to engage with his fan. "Oh, Park Chanyeol. I can't tell you how much I love this book." The woman praises him. Chanyeol gives her a grateful smile as he signs to her name on the first page of the book. She was squealing throughout being in front of Chanyeol and she continues to do so, even louder after they bid their goodbye.

Next in line is a man, probably in his 50s. He had said that his wife is working thus, she isn't able to come. The man said it's a pity since she's a big fan of his recent book. It's no surprise. Chanyeol actually gained a lot of fans on his third book. It's surprising to him as well. It works as a double-edged sword. He gets praised by new fans. However, he had also got a few criticisms from his older fans for the abrupt change of genre.

For example, the fan in front of him right now.

"Are you really not going to write about adventures anymore?" This kid is probably not more than 14 years old. He is still in his school uniform as he hands Chanyeol his book to sign.

Chanyeol gives him a polite smile. "I did not say that I will not write about adventures anymore. Searching for love is an adventure too!"

The boy only grimaces at his words. "Do you think a kid like me would like to read something about love?"

This manages to make Chanyeol laugh. He's not wrong. His previous target audience were teenagers when he wrote those adventure books. However, with his new book, he attracted mostly new female readers.

"Well, maybe I'll switch it up again for the next book. No promises!" Chanyeol gives him back the book. Despite what he said, the boy still came all the way here to meet him and have his sign. Chanyeol is grateful for that kind of fan.

"Hello! I'm Lu! And a new fan!" This time it's another student. She's calmer than most of the adult women that showed up but she still has a radiant smile on her face.

Chanyeol signs her name. "Hello, Lu! Have you eaten breakfast?"

"I have!" The girl chirps excitedly. "Mr Park Chanyeol, the book is great. But the ending..." She ponders but soon backtracks on her words. "It's good! The ending is beautiful and fitting! But a lot of people including me wonders if the couple will reunite once more. Perhaps there will be a second book?"

The taller reflects her smile. What a sweet kid. The events in the book; the beginning, the ending, it is heavily based on his 15 years of living. He projects himself through this character in his book. Ever since the book is published, he received multiple questions on whether the main character goes back to his hometown to meet the man he loves.

They didn't know... but _'he'_ did.

"Do you want a sequel to it?" Chanyeol asks with a grin. Instantly, the girl nods her head excitedly. With a chuckle, Chanyeol hands her the already signed book. "Me too." He answers.

For more than an hour, Chanyeol keeps entertaining his fans until the last person. His arms are starting to sore from signing more than 40 books today. "Hey." A man appears beside him.

Oh great! It's his assistant!

"Here's your bagel." The man hands Chanyeol a plastic bag. Taeyang is his newest assistant that he appointed. The change was necessary due to his previous assistant getting married. So for a while, it will be the new and refreshing Taeyang.

"Thank you." Chanyeol says before dipping his hand inside the plastic. He's been starving since he started signing. That's what happens when he missed his breakfast. "Have you had your breakfast?" Chanyeol asks him.

"Don't worry. I already have." Taeyang says with a bow.

Chanyeol eats silently as he restores his energy. His next schedule will be at another bookstore. His schedule for today is slightly more hectic than usual. Tomorrow, he has an author reading event and that's another challenge that he must prepare for. It's a totally different feel reading an adventure book out loud than a romance book. It is a tiny bit out of his element which is why Chanyeol had been practising a lot to give his readers a good time.

"When you first announced your new book, I was shocked it would be a total change of genre." Taeyang says as he picks up one of Chanyeol's books.

Chanyeol hears that a lot. Too much to count. "I was unsure too at first but I was motivated to write it."

"Could it be... this book is based on a true story?" His assistant jokes.

Chanyeol pauses. He swallows his chewed bagel before looking at his standing assistant. "Who knows." He shrugs with a wink of an eye.

His new book, although he did not label it as "Based on True Story" but it is heavily inspired by his childhood events. _His_ _first love._

One of the praises he received is saying how they felt every emotion that Chanyeol had written. As if it was real. Chanyeol wishes he could tell them it is indeed real. While writing his 3rd book, he had one person in his mind.

The untold stories, the side of his story that was overlooked, Chanyeol conveys them into words.

"Ah, before I forgot!" Taeyang says suddenly. He opens the zip of his bag as he rummages in it to search for something. "A man wanted to see you just now. But I told him that the signing has ended and that you're heading to another schedule. But he left something for you."

"A man?" Chanyeol questions. One of his fans, perhaps?

"Yes. Quite pretty too! He was dejected when I’d said that you can't meet anyone now. But, because he was good looking, I told him to come to the bookstore again tomorrow for your reading."

Chanyeol scoffs. "Now don't go flirting with my fans."

"I am not!" Taeyang says defensively. "By the way, he gave you a gift." His assistant hands him a paper. Without much thought, Chanyeol takes the paper from Taeyang's hand. Ahh... a drawing of him. It's a picture of him smiling as he signs his books for a line of people. This artist must have been around while the event was going on.

"How fortunate to receive such gift!" Taeyang huffs in jealousy. "Does it have a name written?"

Of course, every drawing has a signature at the bottom. But that's the only thing there is. A sign without a name so Chanyeol is not exactly sure who it is from. It's a pity. Chanyeol would very much like to know the name of his fan who drew him very charmingly.

"Shall we?" Chanyeol asks after wearing his coat.

The next day comes with a blink of an eye. Before Chanyeol notices, he is standing behind a shelf as he tries to warm his voice up. This is not his first author reading but he is most definitely nervous as if it is his first.

"Do you need water?"

Chanyeol shakes his head. He already drank plenty of it a few minutes ago. Any more of it, it will be a business between him and his bladder. "Is there a lot of people?" Chanyeol is too scared to take a peek behind. He can only hear a lot of people chattering.

"You mustn't doubt your influence," Taeyang replies.

Well, that's good, right?

God, Chanyeol hopes he can do well. He did pretty well with his first two books. His third would sound different. Very new, very foreign of him despite it doing so well. Thus, the pressure is on his shoulders.

"You will do a good job, I am sure!" Taeyang cheers him with his thumbs up.

Chanyeol chuckles. Such a young and optimistic man. It is pleasant to say that Chanyeol landed a good assistant thanks to a friend's recommendation.

"Oh, I need to discuss something with the store manager." Taeyang states before he flies off somewhere. With Taeyang gone, Chanyeol leans his forehead against the shelf. Breathing a sigh, Chanyeol looks down to his hand where he's holding his book. He finished writing the book half a year after his stay in his hometown. The first draft was written while he was still there. Chanyeol remembers struggling to find a topic. He was ready to find a new adventure to write inspired by his hometown. However, his home did manage to inspire him a new story. But it wasn't a mythical teenage adventure storybook.

It's about Chanyeol's loving memories of his first love.

As Chanyeol is rummaging through the pocket of his coat, he retrieves the candy to calm his nerves but along with it, Chanyeol accidentally pulls out a piece of folded paper.

_Hmm?_

Unfolding it, it is the paper that he received from the fan yesterday. A drawing.

Chanyeol's face softens with awe at such work of art. He should've stuck the paper at his board in his office. If only this person had written their name, Chanyeol wouldn’t mind dedicating a signed book for them. His eyes then fall on the signature at the bottom left. It is small and very unique but Chanyeol is suddenly at the thought that he has seen this signature before. Certainly, he is not one to memorize people’s signature, however, this one is _very_ familiar to Chanyeol’s judgements.

Squinting his eyes, Chanyeol tries to make a word out of the cursive writing. Sadly, he is only able to distinguish the first 3 letters that spelt ‘J-U-N’.

What a pity, Chanyeol shakes his head. He was about to fold the paper back into his pocket when his brain clicks out of the sudden...

It can't be...

 _Jun_.

Staring back at the signature, the fold between Chanyeol’s eyebrows become more apparent.

 _Wait a minute..._ Chanyeol fishes out his wallet in a hurried manner. Right in the pocket of his wallet, he pulls out one piece of paper. Comparing the signature contains in both papers, Chanyeol finds himself utterly speechless.

He knew it. Chanyeol knew it! He had this inkling feeling that he has seen this art style before.

And his hunch is correct.

 _Oh, God._ Chanyeol's leg was about to give out. He puts the letter that Junmyeon wrote for him 2 years ago back in his wallet. This can't be it…

Does this means… Junmyeon is here?

Almost instantly, Chanyeol finds it hard to breathe. The art... and the _letter_. It's by the same person. It would be a lie if Chanyeol said he hadn't thought about meeting Junmyeon again. But the probability of seeing Junmyeon after what they’ve gone through is a thought beyond far away.

To have something that was impossible becoming possible, Chanyeol finds himself wondering if everything is too good to be true.

"Mr Park." His name is being called, successfully pulls his thoughts to halt. "Shall we start?"

"Huh— oh, Right! Right!" Chanyeol says as he realizes the woman in front of him is the store manager. She informs him that she will go up to the podium first and Chanyeol will soon do so after she had introduced him.

Chanyeol nods in midst of his growing trickles of sweat.

Taking a deep breath, he fixes his shirt and hair before clearing his mind. He'll think about this later. The store manager has already begun talking to the audience. All while, Chanyeol can't help but scans the audience. Didn't Taeyang say that the person who drew the art would be here today? One by one, row by row, Chanyeol looks for a certain blond man.

"Please welcome, Park Chanyeol!"

That's his cue to take the floor. Chanyeol moves to the podium and places his book on it. His voice is a little shaky as he stares across the room. "Good afternoon. Thank you for coming today and I... I will be reading to you my 3rd book.”

For a second, Chanyeol got distracted. How can he be so sure that Junmyeon would appear before him? For all Chanyeol could know, Junmyeon could have changed his mind from yesterday.

A few minutes at the front is enough for Chanyeol to scan everyone that attends his reading. To his disappointment, he failed to spot any familiar face. If the man is a part of the audience, it shouldn't be that hard to find him considering most attendees are women.

Although his voice didn't waver anymore while he reads the excerpts he had chosen, Chanyeol's mind couldn’t stop thinking about Junmyeon. With the blond male in his head, Chanyeol's motivation to do well increases at the thought that Junmyeon is listening.

If the man is, then Chanyeol would most definitely want Junmyeon to feel and absorbed every word.

Even when the reading is slowly coming to an end, Chanyeol still can’t find him. Slowly, Chanyeol gives up at the thought of seeing Junmyeon today. Maybe Junmyeon did had a change of heart overnight. If that’s true then Chanyeol can’t do anything about it other than drink it all away.

Alas, it's just a feign hope.

“Thank you all for coming. I had a very wonderful time and hopefully, it is pleasant for you all as well.” Chanyeol concludes with a bow before he steps down.

As everyone begins to leave once the event is done, Chanyeol leans himself against his assistant. "I am devastated, Taeyang."

The other man hands him his usual bag of bagels as if he already knew that Chanyeol is about to whine. "Here you go."

"Aww thanks. But I'm still very sad. You said he'd be here." Chanyeol frowns while munching down his pastry.

"Who would?"

 _Junmyeon_ , Chanyeol internally answers.

The love of his life even after all these years of no news. Pathetically holding onto a paper that holds no promise. It's not like Chanyeol hadn't tried moving on. Over the past 2 years, he did go out on several dates with men and women and yet, when he comes home, he would be reading Junmyeon's letter over and over again.

At one point, Chanyeol just doesn't try anymore to move on.

"Forget it. Maybe I'll see him one day but not today." Chanyeol yawns with his head tilted to the back. Perhaps today is not meant to be as well. It’s best that he focuses on his next schedule rather than thinking about something impossible.

"Again, who are you talking about?" Taeyang asks.

"Who else. The fan that you mentioned."

Taeyang whistles. "Oh, him? He's right there." The younger points to one of the shelves not far from them.

Instantly, Chanyeol whips his head so fast to the direction where Taeyang is pointing. Granted, there's a man whose head is peeking from the shelf and when all eyes are on the said figure, the man flinches in surprised.

Chanyeol’s eyes widen before his legs instinctively march down to the said man.

Every step Chanyeol takes, his heart is thumping loudly that his eardrums can feel it. While Chanyeol is approaching, he can see the man is panicking as he picks up a random book to cover his face. However, it is all futile. Chanyeol has already seen his face.

Anyone would be crazy if they think that Chanyeol wouldn't recognize Junmyeon even from a few feet afar. The one thing that he's thankful is that Junmyeon isn't running away. The man could’ve run away if he wanted to but instead, he is glued to his place.

Chanyeol stops just right in front of the said man. Glancing from his head to toe, Junmyeon is wearing something nice and he smells good too. Chanyeol takes this as Junmyeon has been living well.

It's a relief.

All these years, Chanyeol had wondered if he and Joowon are living well.

"Junmyeon." Chanyeol calls him first. To Chanyeol's amusement, Junmyeon still has a book covering his face. It's a funny sight to witness but Chanyeol rather sees Junmyeon's face than only his head. "It's you right, Junmyeon?" Chanyeol asks as his hand pushes down the book to reveal the blonde's face.

It feels like the time around him had stopped when Junmyeon's beautiful brown eyes stand before him. God knows for how long Chanyeol had yearned to see them again. His lips quiver when Junmyeon's face comes into full view. Chanyeol couldn't stop staring. He doesn't want to. Unlike him, the man in front of him couldn't hold their eye contact as he casts his gaze downwards. "I..."

"You've finally decided to stop running away from me?" Chanyeol says. There's a slight difference in Junmyeon as of now. His cheeks look fuller. Healthier. Much better overall and that is such wonderful news to Chanyeol.

"I just...want to see you." Junmyeon answers truthfully. "But you don't have to see me. I understand if you are not comfortable." The blond quickly adds the last part.

Chuckling, Chanyeol really wants to knock Junmyeon on his head. Which part of his expression or body language that says he doesn't want to see Junmyeon. If anything, Chanyeol means the opposite. "That makes the two of us. I've been wanting to meet you." Chanyeol utters, his hands on his sides are itching to touch the latter.

Junmyeon looks genuinely surprised at Chanyeol's words. Soon, his lips begin to tug downwards. "Even after what I've done?"

Instead of answering, Chanyeol finally makes the first move to reach out to Junmyeon. He presents the latter his palm in front of him. "Hold me." Chanyeol whispers gently, the heart in his chest feels like it is about to burst. "Hold me so I know this isn't a dream." Junmyeon gulps before his fingers slowly slip between Chanyeol's. The brunet didn't realize he was holding his breath until their fingers are completely intertwined together. "This is not a dream." Chanyeol exhales heavily. The smile on his face gets wider as his hand squeezes tighter.

This familiar warmth in his hand. He didn't think he could feel it again. When Chanyeol sees how Junmyeon's lips are trembling, Chanyeol pulls him by his hand until their foreheads touch. He loves the sound that Junmyeon made when he gasps at the sudden closeness. "Why did you come back, Junmyeon?" As much as Chanyeol is happy that Junmyeon's back, he cannot get his hopes up any higher.

"I'm here to apologise to you." Junmyeon mutters with a croaked voice. He's on the verge of tears and so is Chanyeol. "Joowon said that I can find you here... I want to see you so I can properly beg for your forgiveness."

Chanyeol pulls away. _Beg?_ He doesn't have to beg. Since a long time ago, Chanyeol has already forgiven him. If only Junmyeon had let Chanyeol talk to him, the man didn’t have to go through 2 long years feeling like he owes Chanyeol.

Chanyeol would've understood it anyway.

But he knew it was necessary. Junmyeon needed time to reflect upon himself. To get better, as he said. That's why no matter how long time has passed, he didn't look for Junmyeon. He solely believes Junmyeon’s words in his letter that if it is destiny, they'll meet. Still, this feels surreal, Chanyeol internally sighs as he caresses Junmyeon's hand with his thumb. "If I say I forgive you and then what happens next?"

"If you choose to not see me again I will do so." Junmyeon answers, staring at their hands together. Chanyeol appreciates him reciprocating the squeeze.

"If I say that you should pay for what you've done to me, would you?"

At Chanyeol's words, Junmyeon begins to loosen his hold. Hesitantly, Junmyeon nods before he answers. "I will. Anything that you ask."

Chanyeol's hand that was previously holding the shorter's hand are now touching the man's jaw. It's a pity that Junmyeon keeps looking down because what Chanyeol wants more than anything is to see his beautiful face. The face that he misses so much that in some nights it was painfully unbearable. "Then stay with me. Be with me starting now until a long time like you’d wanted. That's the only payment that I wish to receive."

"Chanyeol..." Junmyeon stares at him with tears pooling in his eyes. It sounded like a proposal. Maybe it is, Chanyeol doesn't care. He means every word he said. "... How can I, Chanyeol? I did a terrible thing to you. I don't deserve to be anywhere near you." Junmyeon murmurs as he tries to moves away from Chanyeol's hold.

But this is where Junmyeon is wrong. There is in no way Junmyeon is inferior to him. Chanyeol has loved him and only him for the longest time. The past didn't matter to him. _What matters is that..._

Chanyeol leans his forehead on Junmyeon's shoulder.

_... I have you right here now._

"I'll protect you from now on. From whoever. From whatever. I promised to take care of you that night." The brunet's voice was barely stable. "Please let me. You don't understand how I have longed for this." He continues.

It's Junmyeon's turn to lift Chanyeol's head so that they can see each other. To his saddened heart, Chanyeol's cheeks are tainted with tears. Junmyeon finds himself in the same situation. "Chanyeol," the blond breathes out shakily as he steps closer.

Chanyeol welcomes him more than ever. His hand rests perfectly on Junmyeon's waist as he nuzzles his nose against the latter's temple. "Hmm?"

"What I said in the letter, my last sentence..." Junmyeon lets himself being held in Chanyeol’s embraces. His eyes close in contentment when he feels a pair of lips brushes on his forehead. "... I still feel the same way."

A smile plasters on Chanyeol's face. Taking one of Junmyeon's hands, he brings it to his quivering lips. Their relationship hasn't been easy. Too much painful yearning despite connected hearts. The future road surely will still have bumps, perhaps more on the way. But one thing at least, Chanyeol has Junmyeon here with him and there's nothing more that Chanyeol could ever ask.

"Me too." Chanyeol closes his eyes to carve this moment in his heart and mind. "Always have. Always will."

_"Chanyeol."_

_The boy flutters his eyes open. The first thing that he sees is Junmyeon’s smiling face. They’re still in their school uniform when both of them decided to take their lunch outside by the lake. While lying down under the shed of the big oak tree, Chanyeol realizes that his friend has been staring at him. "Yes?"_

_"Do you think our friendship will last long?" Junmyeon asks._

_What a question for a 12-year-old, Chanyeol chuckles. Turning back to the sky, Chanyeol lifts his hand to catch a falling leaf. "Is there a reason for us not to?"_

_Junmyeon shrugs as he sits up facing Chanyeol who is still on his back. "Luhan and Yixing were fighting in the class. They promised to not speak to each other again."_

_So, Chanyeol has heard. It's rare for the two best friends to fight but when they do, it's a calamity. Not to mention they haven't talked to each other for 2 days. "They'll come around soon."_

_"Do you think we'll be like that?" Junmyeon ponders with a frown on his face._

_Seeing Junmyeon's expression, Chanyeol too sits up. "We had plenty of fights." Chanyeol adds. "Just last week you chased me out of your room for misplacing your book."_

_"Well...!" Junmyeon tries to counter but he doesn't have any good points. "...That's true."_

_Chanyeol then plucks a fallen flower that came from the trees. He smells it before he tucks the said flower behind Junmyeon's ear. Seeing Chanyeol’s satisfied grin, the latter mirrors them as he lets Chanyeol do as he pleases. "Are you afraid that we might ignore each other like Yixing and Luhan?" The taller asks._

_"What if something were to happen to us?"_

_Chanyeol laughs. "What could possibly happen to us in the future?"_

_"I don't know." Junmyeon shrugs as he goes back to lie on the picnic blanket. "Being an adult is scary. They have many problems, don't you agree?"_

_Chanyeol has never even thought about it. Aren't they a little too young to think about grown-up matters? For now, Chanyeol likes his life of being a kid. "Even so, why do you think we wouldn't be friends anymore?"_

_"It's just a thought, Chanyeol." Junmyeon says, punching Chanyeol's shoulder lightly. "Future is something that we can't predict."_

_Chanyeol hums. Everyone knows that but... that doesn't mean they can't choose their future._

_This serious talk is making Chanyeol’s head hurts. Glancing at his friend, Junmyeon still looks like he has many thoughts swirling in his head. "Well. If it makes you feel better, let's make a promise then."_

_"A promise?" Junmyeon's eyes sparkle in interest._

_Chanyeol nods. He lies down on his stomach next to Junmyeon then brings out his pinky finger. "Witnessed by this great lake and the birds chirping on the tree, let's promise that whatever happens, we will always stay together."_

_Junmyeon did not hesitate in crossing his finger with Chanyeol’s to seal the agreement. “I promise!” He chirps with a gummy smile on his face. They've made a lot of promises before. But this one, Junmyeon hopes it will be the most absolute promise of all promises._

_The brunet doesn't know where all of this coming from. Nor does he have any idea regarding their future. However, whatever the future holds, Chanyeol hopes that even when there are times they have to be apart..._

_... they will always find each other again and again._

_That's a promise._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: and that's the eeeennndd~~~ I hope you love the long ass ride. ^__^ It wasn't supposed to reach 30k but it did SOBS. Thank you Starry Suho Fest for giving me the opportunity, to the prompter for this lovely prompt and for everyone who gives this fic a shot!


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